Brierley Blogger

2010-10-07T21:31:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends,

Thank you so much for all your support these last two weeks since our Jill passed away. Thank you for sharing your love for Jill, special stories and remembrances, and how Jill has touched your life also.

We also appreciated the many nameless helping hands were there making salads, desserts, sandwishes, etc. dinners for the family the last 2 weeks. You know who you are and you are so appreciated.

The memorial for Jill was special, with so many friends and family attending this tribute to Jill. Many funny memories were shared. Jill was courageous, loved to have a good time, a best friend to so many, a jokester, athletic, competitive, and beautiful to the end. She always said "Heeeeello, How are you doing today?" and really meant it. Her cheerful smile will be missed by all who knew her. Lots of messages have been posted to her facebook and comments to her blog these days. Thank you for all your love and remembrances for Jill. Here is a copy of the memorial slide show, with her favorite song, "I can only Imagine" recorded for the service by a friend Meghan.

A PDF of the memorial booklet made by our sister Nicky is at this link: http://www.snugharbor.net/images2010/hirez/jill-final.pdf

We love you Jill. We know you are in a better place and you are dancing with the angels.

From Jill's Family.

2010-09-15T19:42:00.000-07:00

"Celebration of Life"
for
Jill Brierley

Saturday September 25

11:00 am
Crosswinds Church

6444 Sierra Court
Dublin, Ca. 94568

Dear Family & Friends of Jill Brierley,

Thank you so much for your outpouring of love and support for the Brierley family. Casey and their children have been truly blessed through these last 2 weeks especially.

We are inviting you to celebrate Jill's life with us on this special day. When Jill asked for a celebration of life, she also requested that people wear "Color". JUST LIKE JILL to ask us to do this.

Linda Allen will be coordinating food for this event:. You can email her at Sprtfmly@aol.com if you can bring something to share.

Also if anyone has a favorite picture of Jill they want to share as a memory they can email it to Bonnie for a slide show. Her email is isbonnie@comcast.net

In leu of flowers, donations can be made to two following causes dear to jill's heart.

The link to donate to the Relay for Life, 2011 Pleasanton "Hope West Coast" (Jills team) can not be set up online yet,
so the following address and contact info.
The Non Profit Tax ID # for ACS Pleasanton Relay for Life-Team Hope West Coast is 94-1170350

Checks MUST specify "Jills Team-Hope West Coast, Pleasanton 2011"

Donations can go by mail to:

Diana Nation, Coordinator, 2011 Pleasanton Relay for Life
American Cancer Society
7000 Village Parkway, Suite E
Dublin, CA 94568

Donations to the Foothill High School Technology Dept, for purchase of computer and equipment upgrades for use by students
can go by mail to the following address, but make sure to put on the check its for Jill's technology fund!:
PUSD FHS Tech Maintenance Tax ID # 94-3062524

Attention:
Jan Bing
Foothill High School
4375 Foothill Road
Pleasanton Ca 94588

2010-09-14T18:49:00.000-07:00

Dearest Friends,

My dear sister Jill has passed on from this earthly home, to her new home in paradise at 7:45 this evening. I am sure she is greeting many friends at the gates of heaven. Yesterday I learned she last spoke to someone around 1:00. After that she went into a deep sleep. Her family kept an all night vigil at her bed side. Today also has been the same. A pastor came to pray and share with them. Her breathing was labored but her heart just went on. At her home tonight many friends and neighbors had planned to gather at 7:45 for a candlelight vigil, not knowing of course ahead of time, that it would be her time to enter heaven.

Casey says that the service he planned with Jill will be September 25th most likely. . Watch for updates. We hope to see and greet all of her friends. Thank you for your love and prayers for our Jill.

2010-09-14T08:43:00.000-07:00

Dear friends,
Jill is still with us sleeping peacefully. I was up most of the night praying for Casey and the kids and texting with family up at the hospital. She is still sleeping this morning, with labored breathing. This picture was from about 2 weeks ago, before she had the Gtube and other life supporting tubes. Yesterday they removed the tubes.

Jill is always so beautiful, inside and out. She reflects God's love in all she does. I think so many people are fooled that she was sick, because she has always looked so healthy. In the room they are playing Jill's Ipod where she has her favorite worship music. I know there are a lot of songs, but Jill said this is her favorite. This is a song I referred to in another blog. "Imagine" by Mercy ME. look it up on Itunes.

Here are the verses.

I can only imagine
What it will be like
When I walk
By your side

I can only imagine
What my eyes will see
When your face
Is before me
I can only imagine

I can only imagine

Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
Will I dance for you Jesus or in honour of you be still
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all
I can only imagine

I can only imagine

I can only imagine
When that day comes
When I find myself
Standing in the Son

I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever
Forever worship You
I can only imagine

I can only imagine

Jill is forever in my heart... You are walking that final path these last days, hours, minutes. You are in HIs Hands just like you said.

2010-09-14T00:18:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends, Jill is slowly reaching the end of her time with us. Early today she began to have a fever. Also she was experiencing more and more pain. Now she is under heavy sedation. Her family is with her. While she was still awake they are able to have a little time with her still. She is resting right now again. The family is having an all night vigil at her side. They are playing music from her ipod. She has a particular song I mentioned before called "Imagine'. I am sure she is listening to it now and perhaps beginning to experience that incredible walk from this earthly place, to the heavenly gates. I am getting texts through the night to update all her dear friends. Read the comments from the last week or so. So many heart warming tributes to Jill.

From Lorette -- loretteharnsberger@yahoo.com

2010-09-13T15:52:00.001-07:00

Dear Brierley Blogger Family,

At this time, Jill has been having poor sleep and is resting today. The family via my sister Nicky has said no visitors so that she can continue to rest. Keep her in your prayers as the recovery from the surgery has been more difficult these last 2 days.

On one of our family evenings as we were walking around, Bonnie recorded this video. Its was such a random thing, yet Jill was so sure of what she wanted to say.

Listen quietly. I have also her words:

JILL'S VOICE"

HELLO BRIERLEY BLOGGERS
THANK YOU ALL FOR FOLLOWING THIS JOURNEY WITH ME. I LOVE YOU ALL AND I AM GOING TO JUST KEEP JOURNALLING AS LONG AS I CAN. I HAVE MY SISTERS AND FAMILY AND FRIENDS ALL HERE SUPPORTING ME HELPING ME.

I JUST KEEP ThIS THING GOING. GOD BLESS YOU ALL AND REMEMBER WE ARE ALL IN GOD'S HANDS AT ALL TIMES.

LOVE YOU GUYS, From Jill.

She asked me to share some scriptures also about this journey. I will update you with this later today. Thank you so much for your prayers and concern. All our Love, Lorette ( Jill's sister) loretteharnsberger@yahoo.com

2010-09-13T07:53:00.001-07:00

Dear Blogger Buddies, We are sorry the blogger is a little late this time. The updates were coming straight from the hospital this time and the wifi connection is a little difficult sometimes to work with. Jill is coming along very slowly. We will update today later. Thank you for all your continued prayers and concern for Jill and the family. You are all so appreciated.

Lorette - Jill's sister

loretteharnsberger@yahoo.com

2010-09-11T20:48:00.000-07:00

Dear Brierley Blogger Buddies,

Thank you so much for all your comments and notes you continue to send. Jill and Casey and the kids appreciate this so much. Jill said today that as hard as this last weekend had been -- all the tests, prodding, poking, operation etc, and recovery -- the blessings of sitting with her family and enjoying the small joys of life ---just being together has been so incredible. They continue to read the notes that you send her through the blog comments or emails.

Here is another picture from the other night. The kids made a tunnel for her to walk through. She continues to improve each day just a little. She enjoyed another Popsicle, walk down the hallways again, and had a little work out on the spirometer (sp?). This is a breathing tube you blow into or out, to help increase your lung capacity. For anyone who has a major abdominal operation, this is an important exercise of 10 times each hour.

Today, while I was visiting, Jill started to relate the story to us about how the Lord blessed her so much last week, in the midst of pain and deep emotional times.

Through this walk, particularily these last 10 days, has been many blessings. But God is so faithful. One of these blessings came by a lady named Diane. Last Friday when Dr. Umon had spoken to the family and explained about the blockage and the prognosis, the family was very emotional. It was a very difficult time. Then Jill says that one minute later, In came a lady Diane who Jill had met maybe a few times through church. . She had heard about Jill and that she was in the hospital. Diane felt led that she had a word to share with Jill and the family. The timing was perfect Jill says. Jill and Casey said both of them were so amazed by this ladys story and she was such an encourager and and comfort to them as they had to make decisions about the operation and Jill's choices. Jill was talking about this again this morning, She was just remembering how she just knew the Lord was with her and that the words spoken were just for her. Thank you Diane for the blessing that you were to this family.

I had a very short visit with Jill today. Her family continues to surround her with love and devotion. Thank you dear friends for surrounding Jill and her family with your love and prayers.

Today when Fritz, my husband prayed for her, he encouraged her to keep her eyes on Jesus. I thought that was also a good word for each of us. Keep our eyes on Him, and everything else falls into the right perspective. Blessings.

2010-09-10T17:10:00.000-07:00

Dear Brierley Blogger Buddies,

My sister Jill today was sharing things she would like on her blogger for all her friends. Since she began this journey of walking with cancer 4 years ago, she has always chosen to be open about what is happening with her body. She has continually wanted to educate others to what happens, because she knows there are other's out there who are facing or will be facing similar decisions. So I am sharing today from our conversation this morning.

Ever the educator, one of her requests is for people to know what is happening with her. For example, she has a "Peak" right now. Its actually a NG tube, a gastrointestinal tube that sucks the bile out of her stomach. At first last week, when she first had it, she wasn't sure she liked it. Later she realized it was a life saver for her and her friend. It has helped her to stop throwing up. With the blockage in her small intestines, nothing went down and all came up. She was wasting away for two weeks, and though we had an idea it was the cancer, but there were a lot of unanswered questions. Once she had the operation on Monday, they realized her small intestines are filled with cancer, causing the blockage. This is one of the results of ascitis. This cancer fluid builds up in the body cavity. It was drained from her lungs 2 times now. Also from her gut area. She has had every test, poke and prod the last few weeks it seems. But being Jill, she didn't want to stop trying to find out WHY this is happening. With the surgery, Jill took a big chance. There was only a 20 % chance as we understand, that she would make it through surgery. I remember saying goodbye to her last weekend on the phone. I really sincerely thought I would never see her again. And then, the amazing story of what God continues to do through Jill, and in His grace, she made it through and is slowly recovering. Yet, she also knows she is full of cancer in the small intestine area. Chemo is not an option now that she has had the operation and needs to recuperate. The doctor did a bypass over much of her small intestines. This special doctor let Jill and Casey know the risks and gave Jill choices. Jill, always willing to take a chance went for it. Now she is slowly recovering and making some progress every day. Today she has less tubes, and she is eating a popsicle again. Yeah!

Besides her G tube, Jill does have a feeding tube also called a TPN ( I think that is what it is). Jill has not had food by mouth since about August 18th or around there. TPN gives her the nutrients she needs, and the trace minerals all of us need to sustain life. This is helping in her recovery right now. How long this will be is one of the questions and decisions she will have to decide with her family in the coming weeks. Most importantly for her family is that she is out of pain and not throwing up. She had another double Popsicle today after her walk on the floor. When she would be able to have more food will be for the doctors to decide.

Her family's goal is to keep her out of pain, and as comfortable as possible. As you can see from the pictures last night the whole family hangs out together. Jill is in the middle, loving every minute. She realizes if she had passed away last week, she would have missed out on these particularly beautiful times with her family as they adjust to this new phase of her life. Her special blessings have been the one on one time with her kids in the evening. Last night she had a special time with Brigitte that meant so much to her. One morning , it was Casey at 4 in the morning!

Each member of the family is treasuring any of this special time that they have.

One of her favorite songs that she listens to on her Ipod is "Imagine" by Mercy Me. One of the lyrical lines says --" I can only imagine, what it will be like, when I walk by your side. I can only imagine what my eyes will see when your face is before me, I can only Imagine.....". its a song about heaven and where she is going. She keeps this always close to her to listen to.
We are praying for the Lord's will for Jill and her walk on this earth. We know the days are numbered, as they are for each of us. But she wants you to know also that God is Faithful and He is with her,.... . Jesus is walking by her side.

Pictures to Share:

1. Tucker our nephew wrote a special note to Aunt Jillie Bean and he drew his first heart. Thank you so much Tucker. Aunt Jillie Bean loves this especially because it is from you.

2. Louie, our brother, Nicky and Jill taking a walk on the floor. It is a special memory for the 4 of us to take this walk together. I am here behind the camera taking the picture.

Thank you for your continued concern and your prayers for our Jill. More tomorrow. Sweet dreams my dear sister.

From Lorette

2010-09-10T06:59:00.000-07:00

Dear Brierley Blogger Buddies,

I know from your comments and emails, so many are watching this page. Jill is improving each day a little. Today she ate a popsicle, took a very nice walk; she was able to sit up for a very long period with the Gtube off, and enjoy family time last evening. I was with her in the morning, but she was sleeping most of that time. In the evening when I was back, I walked in to her room, and this is what I saw -- Jill sitting happily with her family all watching a movie together. The family is treasuring this time with her. Thank you for your continued prayers of support and love. We are trying to keep up with all your messages. In His Love, Lorette Harnsberger

Loretteharnsberger@yahoo.com

2010-09-09T16:15:00.000-07:00

Hello blogger friends.

Jill had a rough night, but is so much better now. Jill has had to make a transition from the epidural to a new pain med -- don't ask me names --She just gets to push a button and she is relieved. I had a morning time with her, though she slept most of that time. This afternoon, with Brigitte and Kyle and Casey, she was taking a walk, just before I left. The Dr. was pretty upbeat today, that Jill is progressing well from this difficult surgery. Casey will need to update us more on this later.

She is blessed by all the love being shared with her through notes, emails, cards and the comments on this blog. Casey tries to read through them with her. Thank you for all the continued prayers. Anytime we have is a treasure and each day a blessing. She has been saying this for many years now.

2010-09-09T10:28:00.000-07:00

2010-09-08T21:53:00.001-07:00

Dear Brierley Blogger Buddies,

Thank you for your continued prayers and love that you have sent. The family was gathered together again today with Jill. Here she is up to take a walk. She did two rounds today, two times. Amazing -- what a miracle that she is still with us. In this picture she is dressed in her Louis Vutton designer hospital gown, and walking with her entourage. We are running this race together every step of the way.

She sends everyone her love and like the apostle Paul, she sent out a little message.

Phil. 1;3 " I thank my God upon every remembrance of You".

So also Jill treasures all her special friends who have followed her through this journey of cancer. We have a video of this time today, that we will post later, along with Jill's message to everyone. If you post any comments below, Casey or one of the kids will be able to read them to her.

Posted by Lorette

2010-09-07T19:40:00.000-07:00

Dear Blogger Buddies,

I can see from emails that people are looking for updates. Right now my understanding is that family is with her, maybe one or two at a time. She is in recovery still and will be for a long while. She continues to be herself and be concerned about everyone around her. Just like Jill. Hmmmmmmmm That's sounds like a new Logo or saying " Just like Jill". So today as I am far away, and I have this access to her blog -- I think about what Jill is like and how she is such a charger -- she really is an amazing and special person who has tons of friends -- Both Jill and Casey have tons of friends. So thank you for your continued love and concern for them.

Jill always like to share a verse or something that has touched her.

So "Just Like JILL", we have a little something to share for you.

When our sister Michy was in a fatal car accident over 30 years ago, the Lord gave me this verse. " Psalm 91" I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress, my God in Him will I trust." Jill is truly trusting the Lord with her life.

The picture is from 2 weeks ago, during her 2nd stay in the Hospital. She still looks the same really. Just in bed mostly. Thank you for all the love and concern for Jill and Casey and the family.

Please watch the blog, as you might not get an update email. Its not working all the time at least from my computer. When Jill or Casey are up to it, I am sure they will have another blog update for everyone. You can add your comments at the bottom. We will try to make sure the family gets the messages.

Thank you so much.

Lorette Harnsberger

Loretteharnsberger@yahoo.com

2010-09-06T14:25:00.001-07:00

Dear blogger friends,

This update came in from Casey by text. " Jill had a small intestine blockage which was operated on. It may take 2-4 weeks for recovery. They also found that the cancer had spread more than what had shown on the scans, so this type of blockage could happen again. Please pray for her comfort and for a miracle!" -- Casey Via Nicky

From Lorette

Thank you for your continued concerns. I know my sister is not afraid of what the future holds for her. She knows where she is going. The process is the hard part for all of us. Last year she read a book called " 90 minutes in Heaven". It was such a comfort to her to learn about what heaven is like. I know she has told many of you about this book. I did read the book and I was comforted also. We do hope for a miracle of course. Who wouldn't. Yet If Jill could write this blog, she would let you know " I know where I am going!". We will keep you updated as best as we can.

All our love to you,

Loretteharnsberger@yahoo.com

2010-09-06T14:00:00.000-07:00

Please check this blog for updates. We will try to do so each day. As we are trying to update from a different email address, some of the emails that Jill would send are not recognizing my email address and it is not going through. Thank you for your calls and emails of true concern for Jill. She knows you are all praying for her.

2010-09-06T12:19:00.000-07:00

Dear Brierley blogger buddies,

It's noon and my sister Jill is out of surgery now. She went through surgery as we thought she would. She is in recovery now. They had to cut a section out of the small intestines and resection it. . The family is there, waiting to see her. She will be in recovery for a while. I will update you a bit more shortly. I am getting phone calls now. Keep praying for a miracle, as I know you all are.

From Lorette Harnsberger

loretteharnsberger@yahoo.com

You can call me at home 805 565 0760

I will do my best to answer any questions.

As you can imagine, Jill's family is not able to return calls at this time.

2010-09-05T16:51:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends,

Today the good news is that they have found the blockage. -- Jill is feeling better today according to Bonnie. She has walked, had a popscicle, and the medications are helping to stop her upset tummy for a bit. They finally found a blockage in the small intestines which explains why she has been having trouble keeping food down.

The blockage is operable. What they will find in the surgery is still a question but there is some hope. They have talked with the doctor today, and Jill wants to go for it. You all know Jill and she is such a charger! Her family is there now with her. Her surgery is planned for 7:30 tomorrow morning. Please keep her in your prayers today, tonight, and especially tomorrow morning. The recovery from surgery will be 10-14 days.

Anyway, tomorrow, if you think about it... wear something cheerful that reminds you of Jill. Keep her in your hearts and prayers as she goes through this surgery. Also keep her family in your prayers. Casey, Bonnie & Ricky, Sean and Alexis ( Sean's girlfriend) , Kyle, and Brigitte as they gather around her tonight. Nicky, our other sister will also be there along with her husband Tom.

Thank for all your concerns for my sister Jill,

Love,

Lorette Harnsberger

Loretteharnsberger@yahoo.com

2010-09-01T14:23:00.000-07:00

Hello Bloggers!! I'm finally able to get on a my computer and give you and update as to what has been going on. But first I want to say thank you so much to all my wonderful friends and family who have shown such love and care in the past few weeks. I have truly felt your love and prayers and they have been an enormous help to me, to Casey and to my kids. You are all amazing and I love each and everyone one of you. The pic is from the last hospital stay, not this one.
Ok, so it started back August 6th at our family reunion as my last post said. I did end up going in a second time the weekend of the 22nd and stayed a few days again in the hospital. August 24th I had chemo and that wasn't so bad because it helped with the growing ascities. The Ascities is what is causing all the problems. Too much fluid in the gut and lung area. This past Monday I was feeling so bad I ended back in the hospital for the third time. This time I'm at John Muir in Concord which is a much better hospital where they can do some real testing and monitoring. I now have an NG tube. It's a tube that goes from my nose down to my throat and into my stomach to relieve all the bile I've been producing. I also have now a TPN line. That is a line that goes into my artery in my arm that give me nutrition. I'll be on that for a few weeks or months I think. A nurse comes to the house each day to help switch the nutrition bag until Casey gets it figured out. It's a lot to deal with because my blood sugar has to be tested every 4 hours along with other stuff. I also had to have an study dye enema today to see what is all the problem. Thank goodness there is no blockage or tumor that is causing the problem, just the ascities as they thought. Truly a blessing. It could have been much worse. So at this point I am still at John Muir and not sure when I'll be home, but I will be home sometime and out walking my dog Kiwi again soon. As I said, thank you again for all your love, prayers and support over these past few weeks. It's been rough but with God right next to me I know I'll be fine no matter what.
2 cor:4:17-18 For our light affliction which is but for a moment works for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory. While we look not at the things that are seen, but at the things that are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporal but what is not seen is eternal.

2010-08-17T17:28:00.000-07:00

Hello Blogger Buddies, the pics are from our annual family reunion. This time it was in Santa Cruz over looking the water. Beautiful spot where were watched the seals, dolphins and other sea life daily. The weather wasn't the best but the company was. We also got to go visit Kyle at his latest work site. He's working at a lagoon clearing off the tool leaves and dredging. He's even using the excavator and having fun with it. He'll be there for another 4 weeks working on the project. I had a good time but unfortunately I got pretty sick there. My belly ballooned out and I had a harder and harder time breathing so on Friday we went straight from the reunion to the dr where they promptly checked me into the hospital. Turns out I was drowning. My lungs were in cased in fluid more that half way up my back. They drained my stomach of 2 liters and both my lung cavities of 1 liter each. Not a fun procedure but I at least I can breathe again. Now I have to get back on treatment right away because the fluid will continue to build up again. So tomorrow I go in for treatment. I am nervous about it because I don't' feel good now and I'll get hit hard tomorrow. I haven't even been able to hold down water so far so I'm not sure how I'll handle treatment. Please keep me in your prayers that my body responds to the treatment and that I start to be able to hold down fluid of any kind. Through this time I have continued to feel blessed by so many friends and family that have called, texted, emailed and prayed for me. This is not a fun time for me or my family but together we will get through knowing that I continue to be in God's plan and His graces.
Psalm 34:1-4 I will extol the Lord at all times; his praise will always be on my lips. My soul will boast in the Lord; let the afflicted hear and rejoice. Glorify the Lord with me; let us exalt his name together. I sought the Lord and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.

2010-07-31T15:33:00.001-07:00

Hi everyone, I hope your summer is going well. We just had our Relay for Life event and our team, Hope West Coast, made over $11,000 for American Cancer Society. Thank you to everyone who helped make this year such a success. We could not have done it without all your generous donations. So thank you. The other pic is of Carrie, my co-team captain who did an incredible job of fundraising, and the other is of one of Betsy, one of my daily walking partner. The boys participated in "Little Ms Relay" and in one lap made $164 for the team. They were pretty cute too!!! As for me, I was wiped out after the event! It's a lot of work and is very tiring. It took me until Tuesday to feel normal again. But it was worth the effort because one day cancer will be wiped from our vocabulary. It'll be just a bad memory like the Black Plague of the 1500's. As for my health, I'll be back on Folfox starting August 16th, when I get back from our family reunion. My chemo break is quickly coming to an end. But it's been nice. I've still issues with bowels ( it goes with the territory) and I also believe I had an Asthma attack so now I'm on an inhaler. I haven't had that in 3 years so it took me, and my doctors, by surprise. My blood and tumor marker (CEA) are normal and that I am very grateful for. For those who have been wondering about my father, he is doing good. Not gaining any weight and seems to be stable. He'll be with us at the family reunion. My mother-in-law is all moved in and seems to be enjoying her new digs up in Reno. She is in much better shape now that she is eating and exercising everyday. And she has won Bingo twice now!!! I hope everyone has a nice summer vacation and gets to enjoy some time with family and friends because that is what living is about. God bless you all and thank you again.!
Check out this one minute sermon. It's really good
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/video/video.php?v=10150208006915385&ref=mf

2010-07-21T21:55:00.000-07:00

Good evening Bloggers, It's three more days till Relay for Life and things are getting busy around here. Thank you to all those who have already supported me in this big event. It's not too late if you still want to donate or sign up for a luminaria bag. Here is my link page: http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY10CA?px=9374997&pg=personal&fr_id=20507

The first pic is of my friend Zoe (husband Gary is taking the pic) who I have known since 9th grade. We've been going to the fair every year together. The other pic is of our friends Adrianne and Dave whom we've know for almost 32 years. We were in Monterey with them. We are truly blessed to have such warm loving friends for so long.
My father was back in the hospital last week for about 4 days. Again the weight gain due to kidney failure and an infection in his body. Plus he had an allergic reaction to the meds they gave him and he ended up with hives on his legs and arms. Not a happy camper for sure. Anyway, he is home now, has had his defibrillator turned off and will go on hospice the next time he has the weight gain. It could be in a few weeks or maybe a month or two??? He's in Gods hands and he is at peace with his decision.
Last week Casey and I drove to LA to pack up Casey's mothers' furniture and cloths. She has been moved from Torrance where she lived for 55 years and now lives in Reno with Kathy, Casey's sister. At 88 yrs, we felt it was no longer safe to live by herself in her home. She seems to be doing well with the adjustment.
As for me, today I got the results from my CT that I had back in June. I've had very little growth both in the lung and gut area. Small enough changes, but enough to make me go back on chemo in August. It showed a tiny bit of fluid in left lung and small new ascites (fluid) in the gut area, but mild. Today the Dr. was concerned with the fluid buildup in my left lung because I have had breathing issues this past week. Even though he could not hear anything and he said my lungs sound clear, he sent me for an Xray (STAT) thinking I will need to have my lung drained to make me more comfortable. The Xray showed no fluid buildup. Praise the Lord!!! No draining needed. I think I just had an asthma attack and since I didn't have any inhaler at hand, it's taken longer to go away. I used to have asthma and inhalers but the stuff was old so I tossed them. I'm getting a new inhaler tomorrow. I've also had ongoing bowel issues and I'm guessing it's from all the chemo I've had. The colonoscopy I just had in June stated that the colon was some what swollen and irritated. The dr said today that it's unusual what he's seeing with me. He said he usually doesn't see this kind of symptom because most people don't live this long with the disease. He said more and more patients are living longer with the disease so this is new territory. I think they are living longer because they are getting dx at an earlier age and are stronger and more able to fight longer. So please get your colonoscopy and don't' delay. So as of today, I'm feeling pretty good except for the breathing and the bowel issues, but I'm not complaining. I get to wake up and see a beautiful sky and enjoy a new day. As I've said before, all my days are good, I just may have some bad moments in the day.
Now for a bazaar story: Last Wednesday night Casey and I were driving back up to the bay area. At about 11:30 pm, I turned off an off ramp to switch driver. As I was getting back into the passenger side I noticed a small black wallet in the dirt. I opened it and found a small red camera. When I showed Brigitte the camera the next day, she and I tried to see if we could find a name or something to help us find the owner. but we didn't have any luck at first. However, Brigitte noticed that some of the pics were taken up in Chico, in Upper Bidwell Park and also of a dorm room with lots of pictures on a wall. Kyle got the camera zoomed onto the wall with pictures and found a name. Brigitte went on facebook with the name and found the girl. Sure enough! She goes to Chico and she had lost her camera on her LA trip. We are meeting her tomorrow to return the camera back to her. One up for technology!!!
Thank you all for your continued love, support and prayers for almost four years. Yes, it'll be 4 years next month. I've learned so much on this journey and I hope in some way you have too. I've also learned the importance of living for the moment and not worry about tomorrows. God has been my rock and my salvation and He will continue to lead me on this path. I can only hope and pray that one day if you ever find yourself in need, that you will remember to turn to God.
Psalm 18:2 The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer;my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

2010-06-22T15:58:00.000-07:00

Hi blogger, Well Sean did it! He graduated from Cal State East Bay a week ago. The pic is from left, Alexis, Bonnie, Sean, Brigitte, Kyle and Ricky. The other pic is of the kids graduation party celebrating by playing flip cup in our backyard over the weekend. I guess that's what you learn in college??? Sean will continue to work for AMR and will start to apply for fire jobs once again. Because of cutbacks it may be more challenging than completing school! As for Kyle, he started a new job in construction and seems to really like it. It's a small local company that deals with aquatics and dredging mostly in the bay area for commercial and public works. It's a real blessing when these guys can come out of school now and get a job. Boy have times changed in the past few years...
As for me, I had my annual colonoscopy on Monday. All was clear!!! They didn't even take a biopsy of anything! The one thing that was noted was a rectal fistula (a very small hole in the rectum) that will have to be addressed. The dr thinks it's caused from damage to the rectum when I had radiation. I see my colorectal surgeon next Monday to discuss what to do about it and also to talk about replacing my port that has quit working. I guess I wore this one out. I also have a CT Monday so please keep me in your prayers. I've been off of all chemo since the middle of May and it's been great. So if the CT is ok, I'll stay off through July at least...we'll see. I know I'm in Gods plan so I'm not too worried about the results. Quartly CT's keep me aware of how much I need and depend on God for my life both physically and mentally. He gives me the peace I need to cope with this disease. Chemo and Radiation do break down the body but Job clarifies what is important. Job 19:25-27 I know that my Redeemer lives and that in the end He will stand upon the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God . I myself will see him with my own eyes, I and not another.

2010-05-23T20:40:00.000-07:00

Hi Blogger Buddies! I hope everyone is doing great! The pics are of Kyle at his graduation last Friday in Chico CA. Yes, he is finally done with Construction Management. Now he just has to get a job!!! If he doesn't find one soon, I have LOTS of repair that needs to be done around my house. That should get him looking for a real job fast! He's also motivated to find work because he really doesn't want to live back at home after being out for about 5 years. He moves in this next week so it's going to be a little trying getting used to having him around again. Brigitte will also be moving in but just until the beginning of August. She starts her student teaching Aug 11th in an elementary class up in Chico. I guess I'll have to start cooking dinners every night again. At least I won't have leftovers go bad in the frig anymore!
Well, I'm on a chemo holiday now. It happened because after the number 8 treatment I got the flu and was sick for about a week. Really sick. Casey even got sick himself but he recovered within 4 days. So when I was scheduled for #9 treatment I told the dr I couldn't do the full treatment because I hadn't recovered fully from the flu. She gave me a lighter treatment but again I got really sick and it took about 2 weeks to get back to somewhat normal. By this time I decided to go to my GI doctor and discuss the issues I was having. That was a prayer answered immediately because the day I called, they had an opening and I got right in. That never happens unless God intervenes! So in I went and my GI doctor really listened to me and my concerns. He was great and really made me feel like he cared! He decided I may have an infection in the colon or something that can come up with all the treatments I've had. He had me do three stool tests and he's testing for about 10 different things including testing for gluten tolerance. I'll know in about a week the results. I'm also going to have my annual colonoscopy in late June. Yes, it's annual so you people that haven't had one or need to schedule, remember, I get to have one EVERY year!!! It's no big deal so get it done....I needed to make my push! Anyway, since I'm having issues, my GI dr said I should not have any more chemo until I've had the scope; hence the chemo holiday. Hopefully it's just an infection and not the cancer growing, but I'm not too worried about it. My GI said the cancer doesn't cause the issues I've been having. I"m still walking almost everyday and active as ever. Thank God I have kept up my strength. I have way too much living to do including the Relay for Life walk in July. If you are able to help support me in this wonderful cause I would be very grateful. It's a very important event that will help all of us and our children, and their children and ... Cancer touches almost everyone in some way and we have to stop it. Raising funds to help with this fight is so important so please if you can help by visiting my Relay page at
http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY10CA?px=9374997&pg=personal&fr_id=20507 (cut and paste this link into a new window please)
and click on donate. If you would like a luminaria bag in memory or honor of a loved one, please sign up for that as well. It's a nice way to remember those who have fought the battle.
Thank you in advance for your help and please continue to keep me and my family in your prayers that the cancer doesn't grown while I am on a chemo holiday. I know that God hears my prayers because He lets me know I am not alone in this journey. I was pretty down when I made the call to my GI but when I got in the same day and felt the doctor listened and cared, I was once again reassured that God is in control and leading me in this path. I am on His time and no one else. Acts 2:25-26 "I saw the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will live in hope". I live in hope because God lives in me.

2010-04-18T17:43:00.000-07:00

Hi Blogger world! It's a beautiful day in Pleasanton. The first pic is of Casey, Bonnie, Ricky and me getting ready to run/walk a 10K race in San Francisco this morning. It was warm and clear and perfect! Bonnie and I were the walkers of the 6.2 miles which took us up and across the Golden Gate Bridge and back again in just under an hour and a half. I felt so blessed to be able to do the walk without any issues or problems and in such great weather. The second pic is of my dad at his 90th party with his grandsons. He was so happy and has been doing really well ever since. My dad loves parties!!!
As for my health, I'm doing good. I have my 8th drip tomorrow so I'm preparing by drinking lots of fluid today. My last blood count showed every part of my counts were in the normal range. That includes the platelets, red and white cells and all the other parts of the CBC (complete blood count). I also had my cholesterol checked and it went up to 190 from about 160. I asked my homeopathic dr I saw last week and she said there have been studies the show when your body is fighting a disease, then your cholesterol will rise like mine has and it was a good sign. I was surprised that she said it was good. Who would have thought having your cholesterol go up was good!!! She also agreed with me going gluten free. She has been gluten free herself for over 12 years. She said the constant chemo does a number on the system and the gluten puts more stress on the intestines so I'd be better off without gluten, so now I am learning a new way of eating and cooking. I have also been busy becoming a "buddy" for the Colon Cancer Alliance, and have been asked to speak on two different occasions. What a blessing!!! I am also doing the Relay for Life and have a team again. I will keep fighting for a cure in every way I can because way too many people are DX each day. Cancer seems to touch us all in some way whether self, family member or friend. If you can help in anyway by donating, coming out to walk or joining my team, that would be great. My relay page is
http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY10CA?px=9374997&pg=personal&fr_id=20507
Please keep me in your prayer for an easy drip tomorrow without nausea and problems. I've been doing really well since January and I want it to continue. Thank you all for your continued love and support as I walk this journey. Even thought life takes turns when and where we least expect it, we can always find something good along the path by trusting in God and letting Him lead the way. In Philippians 4:10-14 Paul writes that he knew how to be content whether he had plenty or whether he was in need. The secret was drawing on Christ's power for strength. God is truly my strength that I rely on and we are all blessed that He is there for us always. God bless you all and enjoy the sunshine!

2010-03-18T11:43:00.000-07:00

Good morning Blogger Buddies, and happy Patty's Day (one day late)! The pics are of Sean and his girl friend Alexis and Casey and me at a recent wedding we went to. Well, all the prayers and good wishes helped because my latest Ct was great! The ascities (fluid in the belly) is almost all gone and no new growth or change with the tumor in the lung. That is great news and a true blessing from God. Even the dr was surprised and very happy about the results. The scan did show a little, less than an ounce, of fluid in my right lung. He said it could be "sympathetic fluid" from the gut or the remains from the bronchitis I had. I had only had two doses of antibiotics when I had the CT. He was not at all concerned and said it would most likely disappear. If it doesn't and it grows then it can be remove easily. I knew something was amiss because during the week of treatment I get a sharp pain in my right lung, but just for about 7 days then it's gone. During that time it's hard to take a deep breath so fluid can build up. Chemo can cause all sorts of joint and body pain and this is just one of those side effects. I'm feeling good now and that's great so thank you all for your continued prayers. I'm living proof that prayers do work because I'm past the time I should have been here and now I'm on Gods time. And with His blessings I'll be on His time for a long time!!!! When I went in to get the news of the CT, my heart was beating and my blood pressure was up, but that was just physical. My mind was on Jesus and knowing that I'm in His plan. Both Casey and I have great comfort in knowing and believing that. And because I have been so comforted and at peace, and I am doing well physically, I was asked by the colon Cancer Alliance if I would become a "buddy" to people who have just been diagnosed. I would help guide them and walk them through treatment. That is something I have been wanting to do for a long time; to be able to help others get on the right track with treatment and also so show them Gods peace and comfort in times of trials. So another prayer has been answered.
2 Corinthians 3-4 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all or troubles, so that we can comfort those in an trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.
Have a happy spring weekend and go out and enjoy the sunshine.....at least for Californians!

2010-03-09T04:21:00.000-08:00

Good morning bloggers. Today is a busy day for me. I have a CT at 11:40 this morning at UCSF, then off to see King Tut and then back to Walnut Creek where I am a guest speaker for a program offered to the public on survivor-ship for colorectal cancer. It's colorectal cancer awareness month and the push is on to get the word out about the importance of screening and early detection. So if you are 40 plus (insurance says 50 but I believe otherwise) and have any symptoms please get scoped. If you are 50 then just go get scoped with or without symptoms. Early detection will save your life. This link will tell you the symptoms to look for. http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/colon-cancer/DS00035/DSECTION=symptoms
So today I am asking for prayers for a clear report from the CT. As I lay on the table I truly can feel Gods presence and your prayers so keep them coming. I have the follow up appointment on the 16th so I won't know until then. On a sad note, my very oldest and dear friend Mary passed this past Friday. We started our lives together back in Burbank as babies and went to first grade together. We ended up graduating from high school together in Torrance and were in each others weddings. We stayed in contact through raising our kids and ironically we both ended up with ports in our chest for our 50th. We traveled through our illness together for the past years and laughed and cried many times via phone, visits, email and text. She got a cold last week and it took her life away. I miss her terribly but know that she is with God, free of disease. The pic is from the early 60's in Burbank. My sister and I have gloves on and Mary is next to Nicky in the back row. This verse is for my dear friend Mary.
John 14:1-4 "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; Trust also in me. In my father's house are many rooms; if it were not so I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you with me that you also may be where I am. You know the place where I am going."
I thank Jesus everyday for preparing a place for me too. God bless you all and go out and enjoy each day to the fullest. AND GET SCOPED!

2010-02-24T13:57:00.000-08:00

It's a beautiful day today with the white puffy clouds and the fresh air from a day of rain. I just got back from my walk and decided to blog about the family trip I took to Santa Barbara this past weekend, the blessings God has given me, and my last treatment. One picture is of my sisters and brother, my dad and his brother in Santa Barbara, and the other is of me on the beach with the birds and the beautiful weather. The Schirm family had a mini reunion with my cousins to go through many old pics dating back to the late 1800's. The trip was hard on my dad had another scare with his health, so he's been in the hospital since we got back. However, once again, he seems to be bouncing back. He said he's waiting for his 90th birthday party we are having for him at the end of March in Napa. His will to live is incredible! As for me, I had treatment two weeks ago and it was the best treatment I have had. Since I have added the homeopathic discipline as well as the "healing hands", I have done much better. This treatment I didn't need the huge amount of anti nausea drugs because of the other stuff I'm taking, and the healing hands has helped me to clear my mind and body so much that I haven't had any nausea what so ever the past few times I'm been in to the onc office. The miracle this past treatment is my white cell count has gone into the 6 digits. I haven't had it in the 6's and above since before I was ever diagnosed back in 2006. The radiation damages the bone marrow where the cells are produced so the best I've ever been, and this is when I was without any treatment for 2.5 months, was 4.2. No explanation for the rise, just God helping me out once again. He does hear those prayers! At first I tried to consider that it was the homeopathic or healing hands, but then I realized it's easier to try to theorize the unknown then to accept a miracle. Well, after about a day, I just accepted the blessing from God. He has his hands on me and is in control of my life even down to my white cells. How blessed am I! So I have my next treatment on Monday and with all the prayers, support and extra meds, I'll do fine. I was reminded of the prayer today at my bible study and though it was well worth repeating.
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Living ONE DAY AT A TIME; enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardship as the pathway to peace. Reinhold Neibuhr-1926. As Mary said in Luke 1:46 My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior.

2010-01-26T21:09:00.000-08:00

Happy rainy days,

The first pic shows some of my family together before we embarked on a yacht in New Port Beach this past summer for my niece's wedding, and the second is with my dear friend Linda at her home this past weekend. Ok, so I have to let you know that the prayers for me really helped this last week with my treatment. I did much better and I didn't end up in the hospital!! One week ago today I had the drip and today I walked 3.5 miles in the morning, between the rain, and another 3.5 miles this evening. So thank you so much for the prayers because I know God hears them. I also used lots of ginger honey in my green tea, I had the healing touch again to get me ready for the treatment, and again a few days after the treatment to help get the toxins out of my system. I also went in for an extra fluid drip on the middle day. Which means each treatment I carry some of the chemo in a hip pack for 72 hours continuous drip. On the middle day I go back to the office and they hooked me up to a bag of fluid and more anti nausea meds to help. All helped to get me through the treatment without getting so nauseated and dehydrated, and I didn't even have the bad cramps that I had been having in my gut area. My next drip will be Feb 8th so I'm looking forward to feeling good for the next two weeks. I will have two more drips and then March 9th I will have a CT. That will help determine how many drips I'll have of this regimen. Twelve is the standard treatment but it can change if I get too sick, show progression or the cancer goes in remission. It's really up to God though because I know my life is in His hands. In the mean time, I get to watch Brigitte play lacrosse this Saturday at Berkeley rain or shine. I admit, it's no fun getting sick every few weeks for a week, however, on the days I do feel good, I am so appreciative of that day. Even with all this rain, I love being able to get up and go outside to see the day. That's when I know I am blessed. Each day I have is truly a gift from God. Thank you all for helping me to live my life to the fullest, love abundantly, and enjoy each moment with all my friends and family. Psalms 136 starts off by saying , "Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good". Each verse tells us to give Him thanks for great wonders, the heavens, the sun, the light etc... and ends with Give thanks to the God of heaven. If you get a chance it's worth the read, and remember to give thanks for all you have.

2010-01-17T14:29:00.000-08:00

Hi Blogger buddies and happy January! The pics are showing what Kyle, Brig and Kiwi enjoy doing in their spare time. Doesn't look look like college life to me!!! It just started to rain and it's expected to last for the entire week, so I guess it's a good week to start my next chemo. Yes, I am doing chemo on Tuesday again. However, I will have a 20% reduction of the drugs and hopefully I'll do fine. This past week I went to a new doctor who practices homeopathic medicine as well as being an MD. She was great and I feel much better prepared for Tuesday. I'm now taking a probiotic powder to help with balancing my colon. She said the colon is like the ecosystem of the body and mine is out of balance from all the chemicals. The bad bacterial is more abundant than the good bacteria so this will help balance it out. I had been eating yogurt but it wasn't enough. I've only had three days of the powder and I already feel better. I'm also taking some support pills that she recommended to help with keeping my organs strong, and finally she gave me some strawberry tea and ginger honey tonic to help with the nausea that I have been experiencing. Homeopathic doctors look at the entire body, not just one part. So I feel very confident with her and will continue to see her as well as my current oncologist. Thursday I went for a wonderful relaxing body massage and Saturday I had "Healing Touch" done on me. It's similar to Reiki only American. It's used to help you help yourself through mind visualization, energy transfer and relation of the mind. This wonderful lady named Susanne helped me to visualize a positive, peaceful feeling and rid my mind of the memory of nausea that I have had the past few weeks. It really helped and I feel strong and ready to begin a new. It's strange how just the thought of the chemo drip made me start gagging weeks after the last drip. I was worried I'd be getting sick just walking into the office, but now I feel much better, more prepared and better equipped to handle the drugs. I'm also back to walking my 3.5 miles a day without any cramping what so ever. Looking back I feel it was a good experience (not one I want to repeat though) with a lot of learning in it. I now understand how it feels when someone just doesn't want to eat or drink. There was nothing I could think of that would entice me to take a bite of any food. That was such a strange experience for me because I LOVE food and all sorts of different ones. So even thought it was hard on me and on my family, I did learn from it and know I have gained empathy for those who have or are experiencing the same feeling. Through all this God has was present at every moment. I never felt alone and at times I felt His healing hands on my cramping belling in the hospital. I was also blessed to have all my family around me, and the pain meds and anti cramping drugs didn't hurt either. Thank you to everyone who has continued to pray for me, support me and send me gifts and cards. Your love and kindness really helps to lift me up and keep me strong and positive. This week when praying, please pray for all the people who are suffering in Haiti. God is really busy there and needed by so many. God bless you all my dear friends and family. Psalm 61:7-8 My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him at all times, pour out your hearts to him for God is our refuge.

2010-01-03T13:52:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year to all my friends and family. Our Christmas was wonderful with 19 friends and family joining us for a great dinner, laughter and playing games. Santa even visited us this season! The pics are of Santa and Kyle, the boys with new shirts created by my very artistic nephew Tyler (he made the shirts from bleach), Casey and I getting ready for the Christmas eve dinner, and the kids ready to go open presents on Christmas morning. We are truly a blessed family. Kyle's quote is "we are like a Bill Gates family in that we have more love than he has money ". Kyle comes up with the cutest quotes. The Monday after Christmas I had #3 chemo. It was hard on me and I ended up in the hospital on new years eve and came home on the 2nd. I had terrible cramps and was dehydrated. I've been on a liquid diet for the past week and am trying to get control of the cramping. I'm supposed to have #4 in a week but I may hold off. I had a CT in the emergency without contrast so it didn't really show much but also nothing new and that was a blessing. We were worried about a blockage because of the severe cramping. It was the chemo I'm sure that caused the problems. So at this point I'm not sure what to do. I have to go in for blood work tomorrow because my whites and platelets have dropped significantly. I may not be able to have the next treatment anyway. So please pray for a clear direction in my treatment and for a complete healing if it's Gods will. Psalm 25: 4 Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths, guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. May God be your beacon of hope for a happy and healthy 2010.

2009-12-13T19:05:00.000-08:00

Hi Blogger Buddies. The pic is of Bonnie, my daughter, and her husband Ricky. They are moving back to Pleasanton next weekend. Ricky got a job with Cupertino Electric in San Jose and He's done with school on Friday! Yea! Many blessing have come our way. I hope everyone is having a good time getting ready for the Christmas season and not stressing too much. If you begin to feel overwhelmed by all the preparations that come with the season such as decorations, presents, cards, travel etc.. Stop! Take a deep breath and just remember that Christmas is about our Lord and celebrating His birth, about being together with friends and family and appreciating all the blessings we have been given. Another such blessing that happened this week for me is that Avastin was approved!!! As of my last blog, the insurance company kept dening it. Well, through tips from wonderful people, I put in an appeal through the Department of Managed Health Care. (http://www.hmohelp.ca.gov/) It's the state agency that monitors and regulates Blue Cross, my health insurance. I filed an expedited appeal so the state had 72 hours to review my records faxed from the insurance company. Well it took about one day and they went back to Blue Cross and over ruled them. Next thing I know is I got a call from my Onc office telling me it was approved! Yes, I was very shocked and happy. A state agency that worked and worked fast for the better of the people! Who would have guessed!!! I'm sure God had something to do with it as well for it to happen so fast. They were so helpful and nice so keep them in mind if anyone you know needs help in the insurance category. Tomorrow I will have the second round of Folfox with Avastin. Please pray that this treatment goes easier. I was pretty sick the first week. I would feel a little better early in the morning but then it would get worse and worse. The second week I had to take Advil or Tylenol to stop the stomach spasms. That was a first for me. So please keep me in your prayers that this next treatment is easier on me and that it puts me back into NED. If I don't get a chance to blog until after Christmas, Have a very Merry Christmas and God bless you all, each and every day. Thank you for your continued support, love and prayers. Without them I would not be writing this blog today. Oh, I posted my e-mail in the blog synopsis because people have been asking. Luke 1: 31-33 You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jocob forever, his kingdom will never end. This is why I have faith. Because his birth has given all who believe an eternial life with him that will never end. So I will celebrate his birthday this Christmas and continue to praise his name forever.

2009-12-05T05:53:00.000-08:00

Good morning everyone. I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday with friends and family. We had our annual football game against the Allens, yes they got us this time but we'll get them next year. My daughter Bonnie, had shirts made for our team that said on the front, "I wear blue (the blue ribbon for colon cancer) for my mom, or my wife, my sister, daughter, son-in-law" etc.. It was so special to me and really touched my heart. After we had a wonderful dinner at my house and on Friday we went out to SnugHarbor for the weekend with all the cousins. What a great mini family reunion. Then on Monday I started with my first drip of Folfox in over 2.5 years. This was the first drip I had when I was DX. I thought it would be ok because I didn't remember it being so bad. Boy was I mistaken. I guess it's like labor, you forget the bad stuff. I was sick the entire week up until this morning. Everyday I had to take pills to stop gagging and on Wednesday I was basically in bed most the day. Yesterday wasn't much fun either but this morning I'm feeling better. I will get a week to build back up before I have another drip. Only next time I'll have more meds for the nausea. As for the Avastin drug the dr wants me on with the Folfox, once again the ins has denied the drug. It's in appeal so I'll know more next week. Even though this week was rough, I felt Gods presence right next to me. I was not alone even when Casey was in LA on business. Psalm 86:5-7 You are forgiving and good, O Lord, abounding in love to all who call to you. hear my prayer, O Lord; listen to my cry for mercy. In the day of my trouble I will call to you, for you will answer me. His presence was so apparent this week while I was down. I hope when any of you feel lost, weak, or down you will remember to turn to Him. God bless you and thank you so much for your prayers. I will have my next drip on the 14th so please keep me in your prayers for a complete healing without such bad side effects.

2009-11-18T17:43:00.000-08:00

Hi Buddies and Happy Thanksgiving to you! This is the most recent family pic we just had last month. I had my dr apt at UCSF and it was a very positive experience. I know God was listening to everyone praying for me. "Thank you" just doesn't express how grateful I am for those prayers, but I don't know what else to say except THANK YOU! I will start FolFox with Avastin hopefully next week if not the following week. That is the very first line chemo regimine I was on three years ago. I'll have neuropathy in the hands and feet but shouldn't feel too bad or tired. It was easier on me than the second line treatment as far as feeling bad. I just won't be able to drink, eat or hold anything cold. I'll be on it until my blood counts get too low and I have to stop or the neuropathy starts to become permanent. I'll go in for the drip and come home with the pump attached to my port for two days. This will happen every other week. The dr is hoping to either stop or reverse the growth I've had. He hopes this will buy me about a year, than I'll go on the second line treatment for another year and by then hopefully they'll have something better for me. He was very positive and upbeat about it. It pays to go to a positive person like Dr Venook at UCSF. He gives so much hope and encouragement. So tonight Casey and I are feeling good and happy about the future instead of unsure and frightened. So again, thank you everyone for the prayers, the cards, the FB feeds, the emails, the calls to check up on me, and words of encouragement. Your response to me has taught me how to be more considerate and empathetic to others. And your continued prayers have strengthened my hope and faith because I see first hand how God does listen and answer prayer. May the God of creation bless you all during this wonderful season of Thanks Giving. 1Peter 1:3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In His great mercy He has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ. God helps me remain true to my faith through whatever difficult times I face. He will gladly help you too! Just ask Him.

2009-11-10T20:12:00.000-08:00

Hi Blogger Buddies. Today was a pretty stressful day. The Blue Cross denied the appeal for the clinical trial. So I'm back to square one except the little cancer cells are still growing and they are not back to square one. I will meet with my Dr next Wednesday in the morning to go over other options. Hopefully he has something else to offer me. Sounds strange to be wishing there was more poison to shoot up me but I hate the wait knowing that the cancer is growing while I'm waiting for insurance or appointment. My daughter Brigitte sent me the perfect verse today. Proverbs 16:9 "In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps." This is why I am doing as well as I am. I have such strong support, prayers and encouragement from my family and friends. So I will wait until next week and try again not to worry about what God has planned for me. This morning was rough, not only did I get the denial but my father was taken to the hospital for a heart attack. I went see him in the emergency as soon as I heard. As it turned out he just missed having a heart attack. He was eating breakfast in the dining hall where he lives and his defibrillator went off in his chest. Not once but five times. His heart was about to go into arrest when the defibrillator did what it's supposed to do. Amazing how it stopped the heart attack. He stayed in the hospital for a few hours then was sent home. On the way home he wanted to stop first at Walmart then go out for Chinese lunch. That guy doesn't stop!!! I asked him if I could have one of his 9 lives! The pic is of Brigitte at a family photo shoot we had two weeks ago. The shirt she is wearing is very special to me because it was my favorite one when I was about 20 years old. Yes, before I was married and I kept it all this time. It fit her perfectly and I couldn't even get it over my body!! Thank you again for all your prayers, support and wonderful cards. It is truly appreciated. As Brigitte reminded me today "The Lord will determine my steps".

2009-11-08T18:45:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone, just a quick note to let you know I will not be starting the clinical trial tomorrow as planned. Blue Cross denied it. My dr at UCSF put in an appeal and they have 72 hours to let me know if its a go or not. I'll know by Tuesday one way or the other. If the appeal is denied then I'll have to go back to UCSF and figure out what to do next. I had to laugh at the news last night when Nancy Poloci said on TV, after the signing of the health bill, "now the insurance companies can not get between you and your doctor". Yea right! We'll see if the insurance industry continues to play doctor in the near future.....Anyway, I'm not too worried about it because I do trust that God has a plan for me. Maybe this trial isn't the right one for me or maybe he wanted me to wait a little longer to get over my congestion that I've had for the past week. So I will continue to trust the one who knows me better, longer and deeper than any other. I love the verses in Psalm 139 1-16. If you get a chance to read it you'll understand why I trust Him so. He knows each one of you too! Thank you for your prayers. They truly make a difference and I know He hears each one. God bless you all and have a wonderful week. Oh, the pics are of Brigitte charging during her game at Sonoma State today and of my dad who came to watch. He's hanging in there..

2009-10-29T18:46:00.000-07:00

Hi blogger buddies and happy Halloween!. This is Chance, Bonnie and Ricky's dog, in her banana costume. Now for a short update as to what is going on with my disease and the clinical trial that I'll be starting soon. As I posted last week, there has been some growth. The tumor in the upper left lung grew slightly but that's not the worry. I am developing ascites in the pelvic, gut area. This is consistent with progressive metastatic cancer. The fluid is filled with cancer cells and causing some inflammation in the lining of the small intestines. The clinical trial I will be on will hopefully stop the progression. It has worked for some and other not, so please keep me in your prayers as that it works for me. I should be able to start the week of the 9th. I've already had an EKG and blood work that came back "awesome" as the coordinator said. The drugs are a combo of 3 kinds that work together to stop the blood flow to the cells. Hopefully I won't have too bad of side effects. I know they have lots of drugs to help with the nausea and aches and I shouldn't lose my hair. My life at this point is very uncertain but God remains my rock and my salvation. He knows when I was born and only He knows when I will leave this home. This is like being in labor. As I've been going through this cancer, my body has been changing...as does one who is pregnant. Then as time goes on the labor starts and it gets harder. In the end there is a birth, only this time the birth is my rebirth into Heaven. Someday I will be reborn into Heaven but as I said, only He knows the day and time. Until that day comes, I will continue to enjoy each day and praise God for it. He has gotten me this far with the disease and if He chooses I will be fighting it for many years to come. Thank you for your prayers. I know He listens to us all even when we don't know it. Ephesians 3:20 "Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us". Infinitely beyond our highest prayers, desires thoughts or hopes.

2009-10-21T18:43:00.001-07:00

Hi Blogger Buddies, It's been two months since I last blogged and I've been busy with some traveling. The pics are of my friend Linda and me in Hawaii. We had a great time house sitting in Kona, going on hikes, snorkeling and visiting the black sand beaches with the turtles, and of course the volcano. Then the other pics are of the Oregon at "Inn at Otter Bay" which is only 3 hours south of Portland right on the coast. The sunsets were so clear and vibrant! A great time with beautiful weather. I know, that is amazing! We were blessed to watched whales, seal, otters, birds and beautiful sunsets from our balcony. Gods creations right in view! Once I got home to rest I went in for my routine CT. The results came back showing a slight growth in the small tumor in the left upper lung and inflammation with fluid build up in the area around the site of the original tumor except on the outside of the rectum instead of the interior. Doc believes it's from disease progression and recommends I get into a clinical trial that is offered at UCSF. So in the next week I'll be going to UCSF for lots of blood work and test to see if I qualify. If so, then I'll be starting asap. I'll be taking two new drugs with the Avastin that I was already on. The hope is that the drugs will either slow down the progression or stop the growth all together for a time. So please put me in your prayers that I do qualify and that the drugs work and get me to NED. There are so many ups and downs when fighting a chronic disease such as cancer but knowing that people are other there supporting me in thoughts and prayers makes the journey so much easier to handle. On the morning of my Ct follow up, I was walking through the park with my sister, and up in the sky was a big beautiful rainbow. Rainbows reminds me that God is there for me and loves me. That really helped me to get through the appointment. Then on the way home from the appointment there was another rainbow. I had this forbearing feeling, like a heavy weight or dark cloud over me but once I saw the rainbow again I knew He was watching over me. This verse helps me to understand how God wants to help us. Matthew 11:28-30 Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. God has taken the burden of my disease and is carrying it for me. He does that to everyone who asks.
Again, thank you all for your continued love and support to me and to my family. God bless you and I'll blog soon!!!

2009-08-23T20:43:00.000-07:00

Happy Anniversary to me!!! It's been 3 years (August 24th) since my diagnose!!! Time sure does fly when you're having fun!! I have been doing good these past 8 months on the maintenance regimen of Avastin and Xeloda. In fact I was even able to do a little traveling. Casey and I along with my sister, her son and friend went to Costa Rica in July for a week. What a great time! We stayed one night in Heredia which is just outside of San Jose, the capital. My nephew did a Spanish Immersion program there for 4 weeks, so we got to visit him for a day. They off to Arenal the volcano area where we walked through the jungle/rain forest and almost stepped on a snake. Then two nights in the rainforest's of Monteverde (The video is of Casey doing zip lining across the rain forest canopy), and three nights in Montezuma where we hiked up to a beautiful waterfall, watched the Howler monkeys (they woke us up each morning), swam in the beaches and even rode ATV's through the jungle. We ended our trip in Manuel Antonio which is a reserve for the multiple of animals and wildlife. I even video taped a sloth! We had a great trip and I was so blessed to not get sick or have any other problems. We came home the same day Kyle and Sean did from their 6 week trip to Europe. They traveled to 11 different countries and had a great experience. We've enjoyed seeing the pictures of their adventures and swapping stories. The next weekend was the Relay for Life. Thank you so much to everyone that contributed. Our team raised almost $6,000. The last weekend of July we had two more weddings. I can definitely say I have been living life to the fullest with Gods blessings! I have my next CT lined up for October. My life is lived in three month increments and that is fine with me. It really makes me appreciate each day, and hold on to the hope and peace that God gives me. I continue to feel His presence in my everyday life. As for my dad; he made it to both weddings as he had prayed for. It surprised all of us including the doctors at how well he did for both weddings. I think he's the cat with more than 9 lives! Thank you for all your continued prayers, love and support. I have been truly blessed through this journey. This disease gives me the ability to enjoy life through a magnifying glass. I hope that all you bloggers learn to enjoy your life in the same way. Don't wait until "tomorrow" but live today and each day that you are blessed with. Psalm 143:Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; let the good spirit lead me. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. James 4:8. Yes, it is true that adversity can bring you strength and courage but only God can give you the peace that comes just by asking. He is there for you if you ask Him to be.

2009-06-30T11:57:00.000-07:00

Hi blogger buddies, I hope everyone is staying cool through this heat spell. Casey and I were able to get away from the hear for a night in Tiberon on Sunday. It's a great deal right now. $109+tax for the Lodge at Tiberon plus on Sunday it's happy hour all day long so we had a beer, appetizer, dinner and dessert for less than $30. Great deal! Then on Monday morning we walked across the Golden Gate Bridge. One of the "must do's" on my list. It's 1.7 miles each way. Great walk but it's windy!!! The other pic is of my father at my nieces wedding. Yes, he made it to the wedding and he's still doing really well. I know he'll make it to the next nieces' wedding July 31st. The docs thought he was a goner but they don't know my dad! He's the cat with more than 9 lives. On Monday afternoon I went for the result of the CT I had last week. The results say ill-defined right subdiaphragmatic nodule is unchanged from prior ct. Which means the tumor they saw on the Ct last month is the same and actually decreased from a scan a year ago. They did say that an area in the mesenteric soft tissue appears more conspicuous. That means to wait and see because it could be just positioning of the body. The lung area shows a very slight increase (.2ml) so the dr said it could be just the cut of the slide. It's way too small to confirm any real growth. The results also say that there are some groundglass nodule that are more conspicuous (the tech likes that word!) that on prior Ct. Overall the my onc says to wait and see. Nothing jumped out at him as to change what I'm doing. So in 3 more months I'll have another Ct and we'll go from there. These test can sure make a person feel insecure, frightened or lose hope, but I feel optimistic and hopeful instead. First, I know God is watching me and taking care of me so no need to worry. Plus it makes me enjoy each day, appreciate each moment and not worry about the small stuff. Not only that, it's really easy now to ask for stuff from Casey, such as I want to redo my house, no problem! If I want to go on a trip, no problem, want new cloths, fine, etc... Cancer does have it's benefits! So, in July Casey and I are headed to Costa Rica for a week with my sister to visit her son who is doing a Spanish Immersion program in Heredia. As soon as I get back, the next weekend is the Relay for life. I will be very busy with my team. It's a great cause because one of the many things they do is fund research. There is a new drug that just came up in trials and I may be using it one day. So thank you everyone who has donated to helping find a cure. It is so important that we find a cure asap for everyone because unfortunately, many of your bloggers will be in my shoes one day. If you would like to donate, my Relay site is click here. Together we CAN make a difference.

I know that I am on a path and God is leading the way. I continue to trust Him and know that in every way He will take care of my family and me. Ephesians 3:16-19 I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strenghten you with power through his Spirit in your inner being so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. This is what continues to give me hope. Knowing that God loves me so deeply, as he loves us all and that He dwells in our hearts through our faith.

Have a great summer and if there is more news I'll let you know! Thank you for all your love and support. Stay safe and wear sunscreen!

2009-05-11T11:57:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone, I hope all the mothers out there had a wonderful day yesterday. I was in LA area for a wedding over the weekend so I spent the time with Casey's family. This was the first Mother's Day that I didn't see any of my own kids. So I got to see my nephews instead and that was good. One pic is what my kids gave to me yesterday. The numbers correspond with when they came into the family. The other pics are when I took Brigitte to Disneyland for her birthday in April with Bonnie and Ricky. I was very surprised to learn that over 600 people a day go to Disneyland for free on their B-day. It makes you realize you aren't as special as you thought knowing how many people share your day! I am doing really good these days. I have had two drips and two rounds of the Xeloda pills in the last month and no blisters so far! My feet have healed and they are very soft now with no callouses. They are also tender but I'm sure they will toughen up as time goes by. I've been having lots stiffness and pain in my shoulders though. I thought I was getting a tumor in my bones or soft tissue but the dr told me that this type of cancer doesn't travel there and it's arthritis that is causing the pain. I have since read up that many people do develop arthritis and joint issues after the treatment. I hope it goes away in time but who knows? Some days it's ok and other nights it keeps me awake. The dr gave me muscle relaxation drugs but that didn't help it much. I know there are other drugs out there that work better so I'll try those. Honestly though, I can't complain. Life has been good. Since I no longer work, my counts have been in the normal range. It's amazing to me that even though I loved my job, it was hard on my body. The extra rest I get now really helps. My next scan is June 22nd with lots of blood test. So please keep me in your prayers for a clear test. It'll be three years this August from when I was first diagnosed. There have been many ups and downs along the way, mostly ups thank God. However, there are times when I do feel sad, down or just discouraged, especially when I've had a bad day with joint, bowel or feet issues. Then almost immediately God brings someone into my life to show me how much worse it is for others and I realize how lucky I am. About the same time I'm feeling low, someone sends me a card or gift out of the blue, and once again I feel so blessed. I'm blessed just to be able to write in this blog! I don't know how people know just when I need encouraging words, creams for my feet or love for my soul, but they do. It's very obvious to me that God does his work through people many times even if they don't know it. It's reassuring to me knowing that I'm never alone in this battle. As for my father and his health issues. He is definitely not doing dialysis. He says when his time comes then that is fine. He has a peace about living and about dying. He loves living and is very aware of everything around him but he is also at peace with his decision about no dialysis. So at this point the drs try to monitor his kidneys with meds as best they can. We know that his time is limited, but then we all have a limited time here on earth. That is why God says to be ready at all times because you never know when Christ will come again to take us home.

Matthew 24:42 and 44 Therefore keep watch, because you do not know on what day your Lord will come. So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him. This not only tells us to be ready for Him, but to also live life to the fullest each and every day because each day we have is a true blessing. Enjoy this month and all the weddings, graduations, births, celebrations or just life. God bless you all and thank you for your love.

2009-04-07T17:09:00.000-07:00

Hi blogger Buddies,
All is well in the Brierley camp today. Casey and I just got back from a 10 day trip to Hawaii. We had 6 wonderful days on the north shore at Turtle Bay. (Pic of Casey and I on the rocks) I think it was the first time I went on a vacation with Casey where we relaxed! We spent time on the beaches, read books, walked a lot, and just hung out. It was amazing. Casey's idea of a vacation is to get up early and hit the road until night. So this was a big change for him and it was great! After 6 days we went to Waikiki beach where we watched the surfers and I hiked up Diamond Head while Casey was in meetings. Yes, part of the trip was work related for Casey. The right pic is from the top of Diamond Head and the video below is from the hotel balcony.
My feet are still a little sensitive but that's because they completely peeled, and are continuing to peel as I write. At least I don't have any blisters now. I just started taking the Xeloda chemo pills again on Monday so I'll have to wait and see if I get the blisters again. The plan is to take 6 pills a day for one week and then have two weeks off. Hopefully this will cut down on the side effects I'm still on the Avastin drip, through the port, every three weeks. All this is to hopefully keep me in NED as long as possible. They do blood test every time I have treatment and this time my white count was in the normal range. I haven't had a normal reading since I had radiation back in 2006. This was truly a surprise and a blessing. My guess is it's due to the rest I got on vacation and because God is watching out for me. (As I'm typing my cat Simon is snoring away!) Anyway, I'll have another CT in about 3 months and will continue on this regime until??? Please keep the prayers coming because I know they are being answered. Also, please add my dad to your prayers. His health is declining as are his kidneys. He is at the point that he must start dialysis asap, or let mother nature takes it's course. It's a hard decision and one that many of us will one day have to face. I just pray that God gives him the peace and wisdom to do what is best for him. God bless you all and I hope you have a very Happy Easter knowing and accepting what Jesus did for us on that very special day so many years ago. 1 John 4:9-10 This is how God showed his love among us; He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love; not that we loved God, but that he love us and sent his son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

2009-03-18T22:23:00.000-07:00

Hi Blogger Buddies and happy day today! I am doing well. I was in the city on Monday for a CT and then spent the remainder of the day sight seeing with Brigitte. The pic is of Brig on the trolley car that we took to Fisherman's wharf. We shopped at Union square, ate lunch and rode the trolley. We had a great day. Then today I went back for the results and all is good. No change, no growth, all is stable. I'm going to cut down on my chemo pills to one week on the pills and two weeks off. This is because the pills caused me to have so many blisters and burned feet that I was having a hard time walking at all. My hands were burned as well and now they are peeling. I'll stay on the Avastin every three weeks as planned. I continue to go to the gym and I have even been able to start walking my dog again since being off the chemo. I'll start back on the pills again in April and hopefully the lesser dose will be easier on my feet and hands. Last month I purchased a juicer. I actually don't' mind drinking carrot juice now and I'm having fun experimenting with different flavors. Juicing is good for me because I get the vitamins without the fiber. Plus I continue to take about 11 vitamins to keep me strong. So life is good and I Praise God for each day I have! After my dr apt today Casey, Brigitte and I went to see the play "Wicked". Casey read in the paper that you can purchase tickets for $25 if you show up 2.5 hours before the performance. You put your name in a raffle and if they call your name you can buy the tickets. It was amazing! Another wonderful day in the city. I left feeling very blessed to have such good news and the opportunity to see a wonderful play. Another Cancer blessing is that it has taught me never to take a single day for granted and I don't. On another note, these past few weeks have been rough because Cindy, a very close friend of mine, was called home to Heaven. She had been dx two months before me so we supported each other through many rounds of chemo, scans and emotions. She was in my bible study and was one of my sisters in Christ. She will be very missed but I know that she is very happy and free of cancer now. Our relay team this year is in memory of Cindy and for those I know personally that are in the battle right now. If you feel like coming out to walk during the relay, or would like to join the team, I would love to have you. And above all, donations are always welcome. The money that is being raised now may one day save your own life. The ACS supports research and that is how we will one day win the fight against cancer for all. Below is my link for relay. Thank you so much for all your love, prayers and encouragement throughout my journey. Studies have shown that people that have a strong support network, a strong faith and people who pray for them do live longer and better. So thank you for helping me to live strong! I will end here with the last verse I read to Cindy the week before she passed. John 14:1-4 "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am . You know the way to the place where I am going." Cindy and I had talked about Heaven and what it will be like. We both had a sense of peace knowing that there is more than just this life here. She will continue to live in my memory until we meet again in our new home with Christ.
Relay for Life:
http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY09CA?px=9374997&pg=personal&fr_id=13833

2009-02-21T06:09:00.000-08:00

Hi blogger buddies,
It seems a long time since I last posted. First pic is of my sister and me on the pier in Santa Barbara last weekend. Brigitte had a turnament so I went to watch. Then the next is of Brigitte making a shot. Notice the ball just leaving her stick and heading into the net? The last pic is of Brigitte and one of her teammates Megan at a recent lacrosse tournament at Berkeley. Aren't they cute! Casey and I thought we were done with all the sports games after Brigitte graduated from high school, but it continues on and on ..... We love it still! I finally got the results of my colonoscopy and all was clear. A biopsy had been taken because the dr had seen some irritation at the site of the incision but all was clear and no polyps. YEA! I am now on a maintenance regimen of Xeloda and Avastin. It's been going well except for the blisters on my feet. The first few weeks had me limping and not able to walk with my dog Kiwi. Thank God for my wonderful neighbors who continually take Kiwi for walks when I can't. Anyway, I have now joined a gym so I can try to swim and do stretch classes. The chemo caused my joints to become very stiff and sore. I've been taking Yin Yoga and it really helps. My body seems to have adjusted somewhat to the new chemo because I can take a walk once in awhile with my dog as long as I don't push it. My hands are also effected but no blisters so far and that I'm am grateful for. I have my next CT in March so please keep those prayers coming that all is clear and the chemo is working. The next big event in my life has been me going out on disability (private insurance) from work. I have noticed over the last few months that my energy isn't quite up to where it had been, plus the problems I continue to have with the blisters has caused me to re-evaluate my situation. I had been encouraged by my drs to consider it. I know I can take better care of myself and keep up my strength when not working so once again I am not working at school, but working on my health. I can't be of any help to anyone if I can't take care of myself. Plus the possibility of me getting sick was pretty high considering I was at a school working on lots of computers. It was a very hard decision to make but I know it was the right one. In a way I have felt like I was stepping into the abiss with my life and direction. But I also know that God is helping along this new path and new focus. So part of my new focus (aside from my health) is the Relay for Life once again. This time as a team captain. The team is called Hope West Coast. If you are in the Pleasanton area and would like to join, I would consider it a privlidge to walk with you. Here is the info and web site http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR?pg=entry&fr_id=13833
I will keep you all updated on my next Ct scan March 18th and also on my relay team. God bless you all and thank you for your continued prayers. I feel them and I know that God is watching over me daily. Isaiah 12:2 "Behold, God is my salvation , I will trust and not be afraid; For the Lord God is my strenght and song. And He has become my salvation." God is my salvaton and my hope for tomorrow and He will be yours too if you let Him.

2009-01-18T19:21:00.000-08:00

Hello Blogger Buddies, and happy 2009! Christmas went by very fast, as expected, and all the kids and animals have gone back to school. Life is somewhat back to normal. This weekend Casey and I were able to take some time to visit some good friends up by Bodega Bay. They have a nice trailer for mini vacations so we joined them for one night. The weather was amazing for January and it was a lot of fun visiting with them. We are blessed to have such great friends. On our way back down the coast we visited the Marin Headlands. I am doing really well these days. I switched to a new regimen for treatment. It consists of a 30 minute drip of Avastin every three weeks along with Xeloda. Xeloda is 5-FU (which I was getting in a pump through IV) in a pill form. I take 6 Xeloda pills a day for two weeks straight and then one week off. This is a maintenance regimen the dr wants me on, but I don't know for how long. I suspect about a year but no one said that. So far I haven't notice any real side effects and I am very grateful for that. I hope it continues this way. I have another colonoscopy on the 28th of January for a routine scope, so please pray that all is well. I am continuing to take lots of vitamins and I have been starting up at the gym again. I feel so blessed to be able to enjoy each day when so many can not. My blood levels are all doing well and even going up which is truly a blessing. I had to have some extra blood work done because the Dr thought I might be getting low level hepatitis from all the drugs. Well that test came out clear, YEA! My liver is holding up. Your prayers, love and encouragement are what keeps me going. Thank you and God bless you all in 2009. Remember that even though there are a lot of negative things happening in 2009 with our economy, remember that God is always there and He will help you through what ever happens. He is my rock and can be yours as well. Psalm 18:2 The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, my God is my rock in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

2008-12-23T11:14:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas blogger buddies!

This pic is from last week when I got be a sub at my friend Robins' bunko Christmas party. I've been subbing at her party for many years and have enjoyed these wonderful women since all our kids were in elementry school together.

Yesterday I went to UCSF to see my Oncologist. My doctor said that since everything they had been looking at, in both the stomach area and lung, was too small to do anything about, I should just go on modified treatment. He even went so far as to say that they couldn't say for sure what it was any more. I told him I wanted to go into NED (no evidence of disease) and I'd do what I needed to get there. He said I was just about there and that he questions if there truly is a complete NED anyway...The modified chemo includes a drug called Xeloda. It's the pill form of 5-FU. 5-FU was the chemo that I carried in a pump for three days at a time. Now I'll be taking the pills for two weeks on and one week off with Avastin once every three weeks. I have to watch closely for side effects on the Xeloda because it can be more toxic on some people. The reason it can be more toxic is because when you take a pill it has to go through your stomach, intestines and liver before it really gets into the blood stream. By this time it's hard to monitor just how much is getting into your system and how much was broken down. Women, for some unknown reason, metabolize it a little different and can have more severe side effects than men. I just have to watch and wait. I'll do this for three months and then do another check. Before I begin the regimen, I have to get my teeth cleaned since I couldn't while I was on the Avastin. Then I also have to have another colonoscopy..routine. I'm supposed to have one every year but since I was in treatment I couldn't have one. But I can now..YEA!! Anyway, I do have a lot be be grateful for. I feel so blessed to be able to enjoy my Christmas so much, while I'm feeling really good. After our appointment with the doctor, Casey, Brigitte and I went to China Town and found the Fortune Cookie factory...yes, we purchased a few bags. Then Casey was on a mission to find a recommend bakery that makes egg custards. They were hot out of the oven and very tasty. Next we met up with Ricky, my son -in-law, and went to the Oriental Pearl restaurant for dinner. It was mentioned by Rachel Ray for great dim sun food. It was very good, but the dim sun is only served at lunch so we missed that, but the peking duck was amazing! We finished the night off with going to the oldest bakery in San Francisco and purchasing a Chinese donut...not so good to me but I did bring home a few BBQ pork buns. They are great! All in all we had a wonderful day/evening in the city. Merry Christmas to all of you and I pray that all you wonderful people make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can, for you can not repeat it and tomorrow is not promised, only eternity is promised to those who believe in our Lord and savior. I have posted this verse before and it's worth repeting and memorizing as it is considered the heart of the bible. John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

John 3:16

2008-12-12T05:02:00.000-08:00

Good morning and happy Christmas season! Last Tuesday I had my dr apt in San Francisco so Casey and I decided to spend the entire day there. We went to the new Natural History Museum and it was great! The pic is of Casey on the "green roof". It was a very interesting and fun day. The second pic is of Kyle. He fell asleep at the dinner table one night during the Thanksgiving break, so Sean covered him with flour. Lesson not to fall asleep with an older brother near by! The dr apt in the city was with the thoracic surgeon. He pretty much said the same thing as the liver/gut surgeon. There was really not much to look at. Way too small to get anything and the uptake from the PET was so low it didn't indicate much activity. So no surgery for now. I feel so blessed to have such good readings from the PET, to have great doctors to take care of me and to have all the love and support keeping me up. As I have said before, there are some blessings with cancer. I have a follow up in a few weeks with my dr at UCSF to discuss what to do next...maybe go on a chemo break and just take Avastin?? I am looking forward to a great Christmas and a very happy and healthy new 2009! God bless each and every one of you and thank you so much for all the prayers. They truly help me. As stated in Matthew 21:22 All things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive. Merry Christmas and please have a happy, healthy and safe 2009! This is my prayer for all of you. 2 Thessalonians 3:5 May the Lord direct your hearts into the love of God and into the steadfastness of Christ.

2008-12-03T19:53:00.000-08:00

Happy season everyone! I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving and remembered to say "thanks"! I had a wonderful time with my kids and so many family and friends. I did lots of cooking and hanging with the kids. I even played football at our annual game. It was a blast and no one got hurt! Some of the "old"guys (and not so old guys) had to take Advil for a few days after! They take the game very seriously and play way too hard! But we all had a great time and had plenty of food to eat after. On Sunday, all the kids had gone back to school and Casey and I got the house back. It's always nice to have them around, but also nice when they leave and I can get the house back in shape. We do miss them though. Monday I was able to get the results of the last PET scan. I was told that there were no surprises and they would refer me to a liver/gut surgeon. On Tuesday I got a call from UCSF and they scheduled me to see Dr Warren on Wednesday at 9am. So Casey and I drove to SF this morning in very thick fog. It took almost 2 hours. This doctor told us that he wouldn't recommend any surgery on the liver or gut area at this time because the spots that are there are way too small to find. He had spent 45 minutes on the phone with the radiologist asking exactly what is showing. He said the radiologist was going to go over it again and circle the area. There was little uptake of the glucose dye so that indicates the tumors are not strong and active. When a tumor is strong and active it glows on the PET, and this didn't happen. Then he suggested I talk to the lung specialist because he wasn't at all sure what he was looking at in the lung. He suggested it looked more the shape of a lung cancer but said that would be very rare to get that disease while I'm fighting another disease. He thought maybe a biopsy since even that tiny spot (which is see able and reachable) had little uptake as well. So next Tuesday I have another apt in the city with the Thoracic surgeon. Then once that is done, all three doctors will review my file and determine the next step. He said it looks like I am responding very well to the treatment I'm and to stay with that for now. So today I had #13 chemo treatment of Folfiri without the Avastin. They don't want the Avastin in my system if I do go in for any surgery. I'm doing ok with this treatment. I managed to walk my 3.5 miles when I got home from treatment, but now I'm pretty tired. I continue to know and trust God in everything. I'm trying to follow His path no matter where it takes me and to keep trusting in Him. The doctors may be confused and not sure what they are seeing, but I know God is not confused and knows exactly the next step ahead. Thank you for all your continued prayers. I am so blessed by all of your blogger buddies. This verse struck me because you don't always see a clear path but He is always leading if you let him. Psalm77:19 "Your path led through the sea, your way through the mighty water, though your footprints were not seen" . That is faith, to follow without seeing the footprints. God bless you all as you prepare for this holiday season.

2008-11-17T18:23:00.000-08:00

Hi Blogger Buddies, This picture is of Kyle playing rugby during an alumni game in Chico. It was in the local school paper from Chico. When he's not studying he's playing. You have to be young and maybe a little crazy to play this game! It's a rough sport but he loves it. I just got back from the Oncologist at UCSF. All is good! The tumors are still shrinking, about 15% or so, and that is good. The next step is to determine if I can have the surgery to remove them. He said now is the time to make the decision since I'm in good shape and have handled the chemo well. I will have a PET scan next Monday and if there are no surprises then I'll probably opt for the surgery. There are risks involved but the alternative is to stay on chemo for the rest of my life. The chemo will shrink the tumors only so far but they won't disappear. After the tumors no longer respond to the chemo I'm currently on, then I'd have to go to experimental drugs. There was the possibility of using Erbitux as another chemo but I had the K-ras mutation test done on my original tumor and it showed I was resistant to Erbitux. That means I have the mutation and so the tumor will not respond to that drug. If I have the surgery then it would hopefully give me more time than what I'd expect on chemo. Maybe even a lot more time. Some of the risks are that I have to be off the Avastin and chemo for 6-8 weeks before surgery. It could grow then. Also, it has happened that when you have surgery to remove a tumor, for some reason the body responds by producing lots of cancer right away. And finally there is risk in having surgery, like staff infection and complications. I will need two surgeries. The gut area is more crucial so that's the one he wants to do first. If all goes well then 6 weeks later he'll do the surgery for the lungs. The surgeries would take place at UCSF. So there is lots to think about and lots to be thankful for. I have been praying for the option of surgery. I have trust in my doctors and I have full trust in God and His word. Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. God has a plan for me and I will continue to trust in Him. I know that there is power in prayer so THANK YOU for all your love, support and prayers. God bless you all and have a very happy and Thankful Thanksgiving. I know I will!!!

2008-10-22T16:29:00.000-07:00

Hi all my blogger buddies, How's this for a fun party! My kids gave Casey and I a 70's style 30 year anniversary party this past weekend. As you can see, we had quite a few people. I wanted to invite so many more but our house and back yard prohibited it. We had a great time and lots of laughs with all the 70's costumes. Our theme was peach color because I had Casey dress in a peach colored tux for our wedding. We had beautiful flowers, lava lamps, disco ball, and even a hookah with peach flavored tobacco. Looking at the pics makes me realize I have had a wonderful full life with many, many blessings. As for my health, I have been doing really well lately. Very few issues which is a surprise after 11 treatments. When I went in for my blood work and to have treatment back on Oct 8th, my counts were all up. I was at 2.9 for my white count and 1.7 for the GRA which is the baby whites. They look at that more than the total white count because they want to make sure my body is still producing. I was down and not feeling good for 4 days and then on Sunday I felt like a new person. I had so much energy I started my Christmas shopping! I have had very few issues this treatment and the only reason I can figure out is; prayers, the new Acai pills my friend MaryJo gave me, and I continue to walk most days. I have my next treatment on the 31st and then a CT scan is scheduled for the 13th on November and the results are on the 17th when I have the follow up appointment at UCSF. I don't know at this point if I'll continue on the same treatment, take a break and just stay on Avastin, or (with Gods blessing) have surgery. No one knows but God what the next step will be. I'm just glad I'm feeling good and able to withstand the treatment. I'm taking one day at a time and enjoying it. With Thanksgiving and then Christmas just around the corner, I have to stay strong and full of energy so I'll keep doing what I'm doing and not worry about what the next step is. I'm in Gods hands and I know it. He will direct my path and He says it clearly in this verse.
Psalms 32:8 "I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you."
Thank you for your continued prayers. As I said, that is why I'm doing so well. I hope you all have a happy and safe Halloween and don't eat too much candy!!!

2008-09-23T18:47:00.000-07:00

Hello Blogger Buddies,

Well, I finished my 10th treatment last Friday. It was not too easy because the chemo is building up. I was feeling pretty sick until Sunday. Monday I took it easy and today I'm doing better. I'll continue to improve until the next treatment scheduled for October 10th. My white blood counts are getting lower each time, to about 1.5 the day of treatment. I've had it as low as 1.2 on treatment day, but they really don't like to do that. Way too much risk for infection. Stanford requires it to be at 1.5, where normal is 4-11. So the dr said I will be needing a chemo holiday soon. That means I will get a break for one cycle but stay on Avastin. I do plan on taking a break in March when Casey and I go to Hawaii, if all goes well. I also had my visit with Dr Venook at UCSF to go over the last CT. As it turns out, the small tumor in the gut that I thought was gone had moved to a new location, just below the right side of my liver. I didn't know the small intestines could move so much! Anyway, it's there but stable. The one in the lung is shrinking so he said he would re-evaluate in about 6 months to determine if I could go in for surgery. That would be such a blessing!!! Surgery is so much easier than chemo and it's gone after they take it out! I don't worry about it though because I know I'm in the Lords hands. If it's His will then it'll happen, I will just have to be patient and trust Him each and every day. It's an interesting journey He has me on, that's for sure. This journey continues to bring blessings each day such as, I will have tomorrow to enjoy! Plus I still walk most days, work full time and I have so many wonderful loving family and friends that continue to pray for me. How blessed is that!! The picture is from two weeks ago when my friend Linda and her bike team did a 150 mile ride to support MS and my friend MaryJo who has been battling this awful disease for over 10 years. I was part of the team because I got to drive MaryJo and her Mom to the event! It was such an inspiring day seeing so many people riding for a cause. Very much like relay for life. It makes you humble when you realize there are so many wonderful, loving people who really care out in our communities. Thank you and God bless each and every one of you for all your love, support and prayers you have given to me and my family as we travel this journey each day.

Psalm 116:1-2 I love the Lord for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me I will call on him as long as I live.

God gives his abundant peace to those who seek him. I hope that in times of trials you ask for His peace and love that he gives to freely.

2008-09-01T20:32:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone,

This is just a quick note to let you know of the results from my CT scan last week. The scan only showed one tumor in the lung and it's shrinking! There was no mention of the tumor in the other lung or in the mesentery area of the body cavity. So God has been having a hand on me and I'm doing really well. I will get the final results when I go to see Dr Venook at UCSF Sept 10th. But I have seen the CT results, my onc in Dublin saw them and so did my brother-in-law Tom. And it all good news! Praise God. Your prayers are working...I never doubted they would. I had treatment this past Wednesday and am now looking forward to having two good weeks at work. It's not too much fun being at work when I'm in treatment, but I get through it. Anyway, thank you so much to everyone for their prayers. They continue to lift me up. Ok, so I just opened up a book to look for a special verse to share with you all and this is the first verse that I read. It just jumped out at me! Thus says the Lord, the God of David your father; "I have heard your prayer, I have seen your tears; surely I will heal you" 2 Kings 20:5

God is amazing!!!!

Ps, the pic is of some of the cousins celebrating a wedding engagement that happened while we were in San Diego. Rachel ( my niece and daughter of Lorette and Fritz) and Johan are engaged and getting married June 5th in Santa Barbara! I love weddings!!

2008-08-24T10:36:00.000-07:00

Happy Anniversary to me!! It's been two years since my diagnose. It's a happy anniversary because I'm here to celebrate it! Plus, there have been many blessing that have come from my dx. I've gotten so much closer to God, my family and my friends. I have learned to appreciate every moment and I try not to sweat the small stuff. I've met some very nice people and reconnected with my old friends. Plus I know that there are people that have gotten their colonoscopy after my dx and now they won't have to deal with having colon cancer in their life time. So you can see there are many blessing that come along with my anniversary. The pics are of our last trip to Lake Almanor in early August. We had a great time with the Allens and Pinelli's playing on the beach, boating, walking, biking, golfing etc.. all the fun things to do when on vacation. Casey is cooking and Kyle is doing what he likes best!

I had my CT scan this last Thursday and if the report is done by tomorrow I'll try and have it faxed to my doctor in Dublin so I can get the results. If it's not done then I'll have to wait till my next doctor appt at UCSF in the middle of September. I have my next treatment on Wednesday afternoon so I have my routine blood work tomorrow with a doctor appt. They always check to make sure I'm at least 1.3 or above with my white count. (Average white count is 4-11.) Anyway, I'm feeling fine except for putting in lots of extra hours at work trying to get ready for the students. So I've been more tired at night and I only can walk 3.5 miles instead of longer. School starts for Brigitte, Kyle and Ricky on Monday at Chico and Sean starts in late September at Cal State East Bay. We now get to pay for 3 tuitions! Please keep my in your prayers this next week that the scan comes out clear and the next treatment goes easy. I know that God listens to all prayers, and He answers them in His time. He's been with me every step. I hope you all know that He is there for you too. James 5:16 Pray for one another,that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

2008-08-10T15:41:00.000-07:00

Hi Blogger Buddies,
After my last blog and my family vacation in San Diego, I had one of my busiest weeks ever! As soon as I got home I had my 7th treatment, then helped a little with the Allen wedding plans during the week. Then the Relay for Life was on the 29th of July and that night was the wedding, then back to the relay on the 30th for the closing. My kids took the middle of the night shift and Casey and I had the morning shift. It was an incredible experience and I want to thank everyone who sponsored me or my team, who prayed for me, and those who came out to walk with me and take the great pictures! Your love and support keeps me going. It was a very special time and so encouraging. I met so many wonderful loving courageous survivors and people who just want to help out against the fight for cancer. Another blessing that having cancer brings! I wouldn't have met these wonderful people if it hadn't been for my cancer. I plan on doing it again next year and every year after as long as God gives me the strength. The week after the relay Casey, Brigitte, Kyle and I went to Lake Almanor with the Allens to rest after the big wedding and enjoy friendships, exercise, boating and just hanging out. We stayed for 5 great days! We came home on Monday and Wednesday I had my 8th treatment. Unfortunately on Thursday I came down with a bad cold! I haven't had a cold since my first treatment back in Jan of 07. I was pretty much in bed for two days but today I'm doing a little better. Since my white count is low, it may take longer than normal to get over it, but I hope not. Other than the cold, this treatment was better than the last...I thank God for that. I still have my CT scheduled for the 21st of August, but the doctor is out of town so I don't have a follow up appointment until the middle of September. I am still praying for NED. (No evidence of disease). Please keep me in your prayers for NED. My strength was really good these past few months but with school starting for me this week, and me fighting a cold, it'll be harder to build my strength, but I will. Since the treatment was spread out to every three weeks, my body seems to adjust a little better. It's easy to get discouraged when you don't feel well, but I learned this week that it's only another life lesson that will pass. It can make you stronger and help you appreciate the days when you do feel well. I pray that each of us stop to thank God for our day and our health, no matter the circumstance. It could always be worse! 1Thessalonians 5:18 Give thanks in all circumstances for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus Psalm 7:7 I will give thanks to the Lord because of his righteousness, and will sing praise to the name of the Lord Most High

2008-07-21T13:11:00.000-07:00

Hello Blogger family,

All is well with our family. I am currently finishing my chemo treatment. This is my 7th treatment and after my 8th I'll have another scan to see if it's continuing to shrink the tumors. If it's Gods will they will be gone! That is my prayer. My son Kyle came to visit me while I was having the drip but I was way too out of it. It really hit me hard this time. He's home this week to do some work around the house now that he is done with physics summer school. We'll keep him busy with painting, repair our front deck, hang curtains etc...It's so nice to have him around. He's so handy. This past month has flown by. I did really good after my 6th treatment and was able to join my friend Linda at her club to do a spin cycle. I also went on a hike one day and have since started running again. I even ran 3 miles before I came in for my treatment this week. My blood counts were all up and looking good. I guess the extra week between treatment helped a lot. My next treatment will be in 2.5 weeks because I wanted it moved up so I wouldn't start treatment the first week back at school. Yes, I'm going back on the 12th. Time flies by during the summer. The pictures are of our family reunion vacation in Mission Beach San Diego. There were from 17 to 21 people every night at the houses. We had a duplex on the bay side very close to the amusement part. We also had a hotel for over flow. My dad had lots of cousins, his brother and friends visit. Some nights we had 35 people for dinner! During the day we went paddle boarding, surfing, sailing, biking and walking. Lots of outside activities for sure. Last Wednesday I took a train up to Tustin from Mission Bay where I had the privilege of telling "my story" for a golf tournament fund raiser put on by the company Casey works for. They raised over $68,000 for the ACS. I was very glad to do it and Casey said it turned out well. Saturday we left for Torrance where we spent the night with my mother-in-law Peggy. Then first thing in the morning we headed back to Pleaseanton. I had to get home to rest! This week will be very busy because of the relay for life coming up and for a big wedding hosted by one of my best friends. Then on Sunday we're having Belgium friends over for lunch with lots of family to join. The pics are the fun we had at the family reunion and of my dad trying a new sport. Not bad for an 88 year old guy. You're never too old to learn new tricks! GO DAD!!!
I continue to have lots of faith knowing Iam not walking this path alone. God always shows He is with me in so many different ways. 1Thessalonians 5:16 Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances. For this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. I am grateful for each and every day God gives to me. Kyle gave me a poem that I'd like to share with you. Yesterday was history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift. That's why it's called the present. So enjoy your present from God each and every day. God bless you all and thank you for all your continual love and support as I travel this journey through life.

2008-06-19T17:10:00.001-07:00

Hi Blogger,

It's been a few weeks since my last blog. This was taken during one of my recent treatments. I am doing well because I have been blessed by so many loving friends and family who come and hang out with me during the stay. I'm also doing well because today is my first day of summer vacation from school! YEA! I was busy today doing house work, going for my weekly blood draw and having lunch with my girl friend. I haven't gotten my blood work back yet but I'm sure it's fine. It was good last week so it'll be good this week So I will have treatment on Monday and give back the pump on Wednesday. It will be interesting to see how well I do when I can rest and not have to get up early every day and go to work. This past treatment I was able to work through the bad times. It was the week before finals and I had too much going on at work to take off. This next treatment, number 6, will have to last for 4 weeks. I have to postpone my treatment in July for my family reunion. Hopefully it'll be OK. I have been feeling good and I still have some hair! God knew ahead that I'd need lots of hair so even though my hair has thinned out, no one would notice. He thinks of everything!!! I still take lots of vitamins and drink the blueberry monster drink from Odwalla that is full of B vitamins. I believe it is helping to keep my counts up and give me energy. After the 8Th treatment I will have another scan to see if the treatment is working. I am in a good place mentally because I know that God is in charge of my life. I don't worry about tomorrow because I am here enjoying today. I try to stay focused on His path and keep going forward. I still walk 3-4 miles a day and will increase the mileage now that I have more time. Thank you to all that have contributed to Relay for Life. I am truly blessed by so many loving and generous people in my life. I pray God continues to bless each and every one of you and that you see the blessing that He brings to you each day. As it says in James 4:8 "Come near to God and He will come near to you". If you look for Him, He will show you the way, the truth and the light.

There is exciting new research on the horizon for colon cancer patients. It's called personalized treatment. Treatment is tailored to an individual based on their genetic makeup. We have a gene called K-ras which is a regualtor of cell growth. If that gene has a mutated form, then it pretty much assures the patient won't respond to Erbitux. (Erbitux is a newer drug that has some not such nice side effects but is good for some patients with colon cancer. My Dr said I may have to go on it in the future.) Basicly a patient won't have to endure a drug that won't work for them. This in very important because no one wants to go on a chemo regimin only to find out it's not working a few months later. This is why research is so important. And why I am doing the relay. Everying penny donated is one step closer to finding a cure.

http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RelayForLifeCaliforniaDivision?px=6076777&pg=personal&fr_id=9814

2008-05-22T20:41:00.000-07:00

Hi Bloggers, The picture is of me and my very close friends having a nice lunch together. Diane, the beautiful lady on the right, is a 17 year survivor of lymphoma and a wonderful inspiration. Her faith carried her through. She was visiting from Minnesota so it was a real treat to be with her. I had my 4th treatment almost 2 weeks ago. Then on Tuesday I had a CT scan at UCSF and met with the Doctor on Wednesday. I was very lucky to get in so quickly. The results confirmed that there is a small tumor in the gut area. So surgery is out for me. Meaning that even if they removed the two tumors in the lungs it's still in my system. So chemo is the only way at this time. I will also have my treatment moved to every three weeks instead of the two because my blood counts aren't going back up soon enough. The doctor said having it every three weeks will help with that. Plus I'll have two good weeks instead of one. I'm staying on the Folfri plus Avastin for the time being. He said some people can stay on it for a year or two. Every 4th cycle, or every three months, I'll have another scan to see if the tumors continue to shrink. So far two have shrunk and one grew. The doctor said that was not normal and probably a misreading. Anyway, I feel fine this week and I'm not worried about my future. God is with me and I know He will help me through all the ups and downs in this fight. He is bigger than any cancer! I continue to walk at least 3 miles most days and still have energy for work, family and friends. I am very blessed indeed! This next week Brigitte comes home for the summer so life will get even more busy. Kyle will stay in Chico because he is doing summer school. I plan on making some trips up this summer to visit Kyle, Bonnie and Ricky. I am getting excited about the Relay for Life. There are now over 30 teams and it is such an inspiration to see so many people trying to raise money for ACS. Way too many people have been affected by cancer whether through family or friend. The more research there is the better chance of survival and better living while fighting the disease. Please visit my website if you would like to learn more. http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RelayForLifeCaliforniaDivision?px=6076777&pg=personal&fr_id=9814

Thank you to all who have contribute. Every penny helps in the fight against cancer. God bless you all and thank you for your continued prayers. I know God hears them because I feel them.

Isaiah 40:31 "But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

I will keep my hope in the Lord because I know that earthly life is temporary but Heavenly life is eternal.

2008-05-05T20:23:00.000-07:00

Hello Bloggers, and happy Cinco do Mayo! Notice the purple toilet?? It's from the Hikers for Hope" relay team I'm on. It's our fundraiser. We put it on your front lawn and we ask for a donation to have it removed to where ever you want in Pleasanton. It's really cute! Even the our local paper agrees. You can click this link to read about it. http://www.pleasantonweekly.com/news/show_story.php?id=608

Well, I did have the third treatment and it was like a party! I had visitors the entire time! It sure helped to pass the 4 hour drip. Then I managed to only be sick one day last week instead of the two that I have been. So maybe my body is adjusting or I'm working the drugs better. The new anti nausea med called Amend really helped. I will have one more treatment next Monday and then I'll go in to UCSF for a CT scan to see if the chemo is working. With Gods blessings and all the prayers that I have been getting, it should be working really well. Today I had CBC (complete blood count) and I guess it wasn't as bad as last time because I didn't get a call from my nurse to be extra careful at work, and to wash my hands all the time. I keep taking lots of vitamins and it seems to be working because I haven't gotten a cold or illness since Jan of 07. There is a controversy about taking vitamins during treatment. If vitamins help to strengthen your body and cells, then it could also help to strengthen the cancer cells as well. I feel that keeping my body as strong as possible will help fight the cancers, so I continue to take the vitamins and try to stay as healthy as possible. I still walk at least 3 miles a day after work and a little more on the weekends. The walking will help me when I do the relay for life in July. Please visit my team page at ://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RelayForLifeCaliforniaDivision?px=6076777&pg=personal&fr_id=9814 Did you know that at this point 66% of all cancer patients survive? With continued support and research that number will one day be 100%. Please help in the effort to flush away cancer.

Emotionally I am doing fine! I know that God is walking this path with me and He has continued to give me, and my family, His peace and love through this journey. He even sits with me during Chemo drip!

Romans 8:28 And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

God bless you all and thank you again for all your love and support to our family.

2008-04-24T20:55:00.000-07:00

Hi Blogger buddies, All is well on the Brierley front. The picture is of Brigitte at her Davis VS Chico game two weeks ago. My sister Nicky took this great picture of Brigitte's goal. Can you see the ball?? This past weekend we were able to spend the weekend watching her play 3 games during champinships and celebrating Kyle's 21st birthday in Chico. I can't believe Kyle is 21! Yikes!! Anyway we had a very good weekend and God blessed me with my health. This last treatment put me in bed for 2 days, but it was Thursday and Friday so that's why I was good to go by Saturday. It seems to be a pattern that I get sick for two days sometime during the week after treatment. I'm still trying different drugs to try and help with the neasea and bowel problem associated with the chemo. Plus this last treatment dropped my overall white counts down to 2.2 (4-11 is normal) and the Neutrophils or baby whites are down to .8 (1.8-7.8 is normal) so unless my counts go back up by Monday my treatment will be posponed for a week. I will know more tomorrow when I see the doctor. I feel fine right now so it's hard to imagin I won't have treatment. This treatment has been much harder on my system than the past treatments of last year. The good news is I haven't noticed any side effects of the Avastin so far and that is good. So please pray that my counts go up and I go into remission for ever! I know that all is possible with God. I am on His path and I feel at peace knowing that He is with me every step. I have been keeping my focus on Him and His promise and that makes me feel so at peace with everything. His love and presence gives me the strength to fight this battle. So in keeping with this battle, I have join a Relay for Life team called "Hikers for Hope". The relay is July 26th 2008 in Pleasanton. Our team is focusing on colon cancer. Please visit my team page at http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RelayForLifeCaliforniaDivision?px=6076777&pg=personal&fr_id=9814 Any support will be greatly appreciated.

Thank you to everyone for love and support for me and my family. This verse is how I have been feeling about Jesus's promise. "Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be toubled, neither let it be afraid" John 14:27

2008-04-07T17:53:00.000-07:00

Hi Bloggers, the pic is of Linda and me kayaking in Moro Bay over Easter break. My sister Lorette and husband Fritz, mother-in-law Peggy, and girl friend Linda had a great time in Cayucos. Most of us were there for a week of sunshine, relaxing, sitting on the beach and enjoying the beautiful view of the ocean every day. God blessed us with beautiful warm weather and clear blue Sky's each day. For those who know beach weather, you know that is unusual. I really needed the r&r to get ready for my first treatment that took place last Monday. The drip went well, until Tuesday when I experience lots of nausea. It lasted through the week. I also had bad bowel problems that put me in the bathroom all night last night. Today I am doing much better. Next treatment I will be better prepared for what is ahead. I have more anti nausea drugs and other drugs to combat the constipation/diarrhea caused by the chemo drugs. This is definitely not like last time in terms of how my body is handling it. One treatment down and 11 more to go. I know I'll get the hang of it and my body will settle down and get into a routine...I hope. After 4 treatments I will have a PET/CT to determine if it's working. This past treatment was called Folfiri. Next week they will add avastin (http://www.gene.com/gene/products/information/oncology/avastin/) to the mix so I'll be in the chair for about 6 hours instead of the 4.5 last week. There has been great strides in this treatment so please pray that it works for me. As for the emotional side, it's been really hard these past few weeks getting prepared for battle once again. It wasn't what I had expected, but God knew and has been there for me through my ups and downs. I know He is in control of my life and I will continue to trust Him and know He will take care of all aspects of it. In a book "Finding the Light in Cancer's Shadow", the author writes that when your back is to the sun you see your shadow and cancer's shadow. But when you turn and face the sun you don't see your shadow. So I am keeping my focus on the "Son" and not on my shadow. Keeping God in front of me helps me to follow His path. He will direct my steps. Jeremiah 29:11 says,

"For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope." My hope is in the Lord and I will pray that you all find hope in the Lord as well. As I go through these treatments please keep me in your prayers that the side effects get better and that the treatments put me in NED (no evidence of disease). God bless you all and thank you for your continued support of love prayers and cards that lift my spirit.

2008-03-25T09:39:00.000-07:00

HI everyone, This picture is of our Easter Sunday gathering at my home. We had a great time and lots of food friends and family. Kiwi, my lab, had to stick her face right in the pic just as we had it timed to take the pic. I guess she wanted to be in the picture as well! I am currently enjoying the view of the ocean down in Cayucos CA. It's a small beach town located 6 miles north of Moro Beach right along the coast. I can see the waves and a few surfers out in the water and the sun is shining! I will be going out for a walk on the beach in a few hours. We are so blessed to be able to visit here for the entire week. It's my favorite place on earth and I will enjoy every minute here. This is my week to regroup and get ready for my next round in fighting this cancer. I had the port put back in my chest last Wednesday and on Monday I will start my treatment. I will have a drip for for about 6 hours to include Avastin, camptosar, leucovorin and 5-FU and then leave with the pump full of 5-FU. Wednesday I return to give back the pump. This regimen is called Folfire. I am scheduled to have this for 6 months. After two months I will have a CT to make sure it's working...prayers needed! I feel good and strong and I hope to continue to do my spin class during the week... With Gods blessing all will go well and I will get into remission. I can take everyting under the sun but I know my life is in Gods hands. He will guide my path as it says in Proberbs 16:9 In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps. I am not traveling this road alone and I thank God hourly for His continual presence in my life. God bless you all and thank you so much for your continual support, love and prayers. They mean so much to me. Thank you.

2008-03-16T08:22:00.000-07:00

Good Morning, and Happy St Patty's Day tomorrow! Sorry it's been so long since I have blogged about the Pet scan. I'll get to that in a moment; but first I want to explain the picture. Casey and I had the opportunity to visit Cal Poly San Luis Obispo last weekend, company event. The picture is at the school with the flower in full bloom showing it's spring time! It is such a beautiful location. We stayed a the Cliffs Hotel in Shell beach where "Pinos of the World" wine tasting event was held. Over 100 wineries were there for us to taste. There was of food wine and sunshine and it was truly a day to remember....yes we will remember because with that much wine, it was wise to taste and spit. After the event we were whisked off in a stretch limo to Cayucos for a beautiful dinner. Best of all was the people that we got to spend the weekend with. Very nice, loving and gracious people that I hope to see again soon.
OK, as for my Pet scan, the new isn't so good. As suspected, the spot in the lung came out positive. Plus there was a second one in the left lung that lit up as did an area in the gut or intestine area. They are not 100% certain that the one in the gut area is really anything, and that is my prayer. They can cut out the spots in the lungs but not in the gut. If it proves to be in the gut, then it means that it's in my system and will continue to "pop up" else where. Then I will be on/off chemo always and they will treat it as a chronic disease. If it's in just the lungs I could still be cured by removal and chemo. But as I have learned, God has His plans for me and He already knows my path. I have to continue to trust Him and do all I can to help the doctors fight this disease. I also know that prayers are very important so I'm asking for lots of prayers that it's not in the gut and surgery can be done. So, the first step in treating me is to put back the port in my chest. That is scheduled for Wednesday March 19th. Then March 31st I start my chemo regimen for 2 months. After that I will have a Pet/Ct to determine if the drugs are helping or not. I will be on Avastin (That's the drug I initially was looking into going on and was told by UCSF not to take), 5-FU, so I'll have the pump attached to me for 3 days at a time every other week, and CPT-11. Where do they come up with these names?? I have my chemo teach class on Monday, just after Easter, where they will tell me what to expect and all the side effects that may or may not occur. I will continue to work and work out as much as I can. I really like the spin/cycle class I have joined as the pilates classes as well. I feel great and have lots of energy. Physically I know I have lots of strength to handle what they give me. I was a basket case, as my family and a few close friends know, the first few days I got the news, but then once again, God came and gave me His peace. I was vacuuming and crying when all of a sudden I felt this huge weight lifted off my shoulders. I have felt so much better and have shed very few tears since. I know that there are no guarantees in life and we just have to love each day we are given. Weather my time is going to be shorter than I had imagined or not, and only God knows that answer, I will praise God for each day I have and continue loving life. If you get a chance to visit the site called "THe Last Lecture" spoken by Randy Pousch, I highly recommend it. He is an amazingly brave person facing his cancer struggle. My very special friend who is also fighting her cancer sent me a beautiful card with a very special verse I want to share.
Isiah 41:13 For I, the Lord your God, hold your right had; it is I who say to you, Fear not, I will help you". I will continue to trust God in all ways, and I hope that if any one of you ever face hard ships, to turn to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than we can imagine.

2008-02-20T21:49:00.000-08:00

Hi Bloggers, The picture is of Brigitte(#11) playing her favorite sport, Lacrosse. We were in Santa Barbara for the weekend to watch her play. We had a great time and the weather was wonderful. Perfect for those Lacrosse players. Next weekend we head up to Davis and Sacrament to watch Kyle play rugby and Brig play lacrosse. Casey and I thought we were done with sports when Brigitte graduated from high school. Boy were we wrong! It's fun though so we don't mind. Today I had my appointment in San Francisco to review my last scan. The small spot they saw in the liver has not changed and neither has the spot they saw in one lung. Praise the Lord!!! They did however see another spot of concern in the lower right lung so the doctor wants me to have a PET scan to see if the spot has any activity. If it comes out positive then he will cut it out and I'll go back on chemo. If negitive then I just continue with quartly CT scans. I will have the PET scan next wednesday but I won't have results for a week or two after. The doctor is really booked up. I am not worried though because I know that God is going to take care of me. He has not let me down yet and I know He won't. His peace and love through all this has been amazing! I am so blessed. I do pray that when and if any of you find yourself needing peace and hope that you will turn to God. He is there waiting for you with open arms.

John 14:1 "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God trust also in me." Jesus tells us to trust Him and so I do. I will trust Him forever.

2008-01-21T12:57:00.000-08:00

Happy 2008 Blogger Buddies! It's been over a month since I have blogged and since I have had any medical test done. WOW!!! It's been a wonderful break for sure. Christmas was fun and very hectic as usual. Bonnie and Ricky moved in for 1 week during the Christmas break. With Brigitte and Kyle staying here, Sean popping in most days, the newlyweds and their animals, it was a busy and crowded place, but filled with laughter, love and entertainment. What a blessing to have such a wonderful group of young adults around. Casey and I enjoyed it very much. Just after Christmas, Bonnie and Ricky moved to Chico where Ricky will finish his degree in Construction Management along side Kyle. Bonnie, with her new degree in hand, is out looking for the right job to support the new household. Brigitte stayed here until last Saturday and Kyle stayed only one week during the break, and one week in Tahoe to enjoy the huge storm. Both have commitments back in Chico now for Lacrosse and Rugby even though school doesn't start until the 28th. Last Saturday Casey and I got to watch our first Rugby game. It's a very rough game and I have no idea why anyone would want to play it let alone like it!!! They just slam on each other trying to get a fat looking football across a goal. I just hope Kyle's knee holds up.

As for me, I'm feeling fine. I have joined the local health club and am doing Pilate's. It is great for my back and my stiffness that seems to be ever present. The first week in Feb I go in for my next CT scan and then I'll get the results on the 20th. With Gods continued blessing, I will be fine. I have been taking 1000IU of vitamin D, cod liver oil, baby aspirin, multi vitamin, and a combo of A, C and E as well. There has been many studies to show the benefits of A, C and E to help ward off reoccurrence. I feel great and have yet to get a cold or flu even though my white count is still in the 2 range; 4-11 is average.

I hope and pray everyone had a happy Christmas and fun fulled new year. God bless you all in 2008. May He keep you healthy, happy and close to Him.

Numbers 6:24 The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace."

2007-12-11T21:39:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas Blogger Buddies!!! The last few weeks have been busy as usual. Last weekend we had the great pleasure of watching Bonnie graduate from Cal Poly San Luis Obispo! Yea! One down three to go!! She is now up in Chico searching for an apartment and a job. She and her new husband Ricky, plan to move there in January. Ricky will be attending Chico for Construction Management, the same as Kyle. They'll be taking classes together. Life sure does have strange twists. Last week I had my 3 month Ct scan and this week I had an appointment with the Doctor at UCSF because he wanted to check me and let me know that there are some findings or concerns from the CT. They have noted some "spots" in the lung and liver. Too small to know what they are but are still concerned. It may be nothing or it may be the cancer coming back. So he recommends I have a follow up CT scan in 8 weeks to see if there is more growth. I feel fine, my nodes are clear, not swollen, I'm not sick or tired and my CEA levels are normal. So I keep praying that it's just the nature of CT scans. There are quiet a few mis-diagnoses with CT scans, and that's why they don't recommend routine scans for just anyone. I think part of a cancer battle is the ups and downs that go with it. I'll probably have many more scares in my future but as long as I have God and my faith I know I can handle it. At this point, I feel I have the advantage of being able to appreciate each day in ways others don't, because I know my life is in a precarious situation. My plan at this point is to enjoy the Christmas, the kids, and all the activities during this season. As it says in Luke 12:22-23 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear; Life is more than food and the body more than cloths. Luke 12:25 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Luke12:33 But seek his kingdom and all things will be given to you as well." So I will not worry about something I can not change, but I will pray instead because He does listen to all our prayers. Have a wonderful Christmas and may you all feel His love, peace and presence in your life. God bless you and have a happy and HEALTHY New Year!

2007-11-30T05:06:00.000-08:00

Good morning bloggers,
How was every ones Thanksgiving? Our family traveled to La Quinta for the annual Brierley and family Thanksgiving gathering and golf tournament. Since Kyle and Brigitte had the entire week off, we started the break by going to visit Casey's mom in Torrance. then on Wednesday, we headed to La Quinta where we met up with Bonnie and Ricky until Saturday. Sean missed the family dinner because he went to Georgia for a week visiting. We had a great time seeing the extended families and doing lots of eating!! Today I go in for my 3 month CT scan at UCSF. I'm awake very early this morning because I have to take prednisone which is a steroid, the night before the test due to my allergy, and steroids tend to keep you awake. I will have the result next week, and with Gods grace I plan on it all being clear. Please put me in your prayer that all goes well. I'll let you all know the results of the CT scan when I get them. This past month I had my colonoscopy and everything came out clear. No more polyps. Praise the Lord! Then two weeks ago, the surgeon did another scope in his office to see the scar tissue and he said all looked good. I really do feel fine I know I am very blessed to be doing so well. I keep walking in the evenings, but I haven't gotten back to walking in the morning; Too cold at 6am! I had my CEA tumor marker blood test done and all is in the normal range. It never went out of the normal range (0-3) even when I had the tumor before any treatment, but they still want to check it every 6 months or so. My white cell count is still as low as it was when I was in treatment. It hasn't risen yet,...I'm at 2.2 where 4-10 is normal. They are watching that closer now. Hopefully it will start to rise soon. When your white count is down, you are way more susceptible to infections and getting sick so I went and got my flu shot and am trying to be more careful. So far so good. Next week Bonnie graduates from Cal Poly! What blessing!!! This month will be crazy at the Brierley house! Bonnie and Ricky will probably be moving up to Pleasanton for a few weeks until they find lodging in Chico. They have to find it in January because Chico State starts for Ricky the 28th of January. Bonnie is trying to find employment in the Chico area, so please keep these guys in your prayers so that they find living arrangements and she finds a job. God bless you all and stay happy, healthy and appreciative of all you have!
James 5:16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
I do have my faith that God is with me and helping me through my "life experience". I pray you come to know and have the same faith so when you have "life experiences" you too will have the same peace Knowing that God is with you.

2007-10-31T21:28:00.000-07:00

Happy Halloween everyone!!!! Did we all get enough candy?? I know I did... All is very well with me these days. I am working full time and doing fine except for the fact that I have so much less time to play! It's amazing how the body can heal from so much trama. I really feel my energy is pretty good, almost up to normal and that is great. Next week I start my round of doctor appts again. I have an appt with my surgeon, oncologist, dentist, dermatologist and my next CT scan. Might as well get it all done with in a month and then be free to enjoy Christmas. This picture is of Casey on our hike through the hoodoos in Bryce Canyon. We took a trip to Utah last weekend for our 29th Anniversary. We had a nice quick 3 day weekend to celebrate. We visited Zion and Bryce Canyon National Park. If you ever get a chance to visit, do it. The geology is amazing and the colors are incredible.
OK, if your getting close to having your colon checked, here is a quick explanation of treatments:
Digital rectal exam. This exam is quick, little prep if any but can only find tumors within reach. Fecal occult blood test. This is just as it says, a blood test to detect blood in the stools. Flexible sigmoidoscopy examines the lower half of the colon with a flexible lighted tube. It's accurate for the first half of the colon and if anything is found then you would need a full scope and the prep is the same as for a full scope. X-ray with barium enema. This one requires fasting and purging and it's most unpleasant in my opinion. X-rays are taken while barium is injected into your colon, while you are wide awake. And the colonoscopy which is considered the gold star of test for colon cancer and polyps. Finally the virtual colonoscopy. The colon is visualized by a CT after the colon is inflated with air. No sedation needed and it's less invasive. You still
have to clean out and if anything is found, then you will need a colonoscopy. Now, go get your test!!!! I am officially empty nest now. Sean moved out two weeks ago so now I have empty rooms. If anyone is coming up this way, I have room! Please keep me in your prayers as I go for my Ct this month (Nov 29th). I am cancer free and I pray that I stay that way forever! Thank you again for all the love, support and encouragement and especially prayers.
James 5:16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

2007-09-16T18:40:00.000-07:00

Hello to Bloggerland,
These past few weeks have flown by. I am working full time at Foothill, and yes, I have my old job back, and I love it. I sure did miss everyone at school. Brigitte is starting to adjust to dorm life. She called ever night for the first few weeks in tears! She didn't want to be there and she was terribly homesick. But now, she is doing better since fall ball for Lacrosse has started, and she has met some new people. She also went to Campus Crusades and seems to like that as well. As for the door food, she is learning what to stay away from. Kyle is doing fine socially and is working hard with his classes. He is really staying focused on school. What a change!!! Yea! This past weekend I was in Tahoe for my cousin Laurie's wedding. It was held at the same place as Bonnie's 7 weeks ago. We had a wonderful time and it is always nice to visit with family. The pic is of my 87 year old father and my two sisters. I have a brother but the pic I took with all of us didn't turn out.
This Wednesday I will have my colonoscopy at John Muir. I have to take the 30 pills on Tuesday evening to clean out, Oh Joy!! I'm not looking forward to the prep because my intestines are so sensitive to what I eat, but I'm not worried about the results. There may find some more p0lyps but I'm sure they wont' find anything else. The CT's have all been clear, praise the LORD! I get to have an anesthesiologists to put me out completely and that I'm very grateful for. I expect to be back to work on Thursday. I don't have my next CT until November, the week after Thanksgiving. I have been feeling good, a little neuropathy in the feet lingers but I think it will go away at some point. I still walk my 3 miles most days, and I even walked one morning before and after work, but I was wiped out by evening. So I'll stick to once a day until all my energy returns. It's been great being back in my old life, but I do miss parts of the life I was in last year. There were so many good things that came out of my cancer that I find myself reflecting back on so many special moments. I don't miss the chemo treatments, radiation or surgeries, but I do miss the staff at the doctors and all the wonderful people that I was in contact with. I also miss the times I had walking and sharing with my close friends. I especially miss the time I spent walking and singing my praise songs and praying to God. He was and is with me on this journey every step of the way. I know I can walk, share and sing praise songs, but I just don't have as much time to do it now that I am working again. I will have to learn to prioritize!
Thank you blogger buddies for joining me on this journey; for all the encouragement, love, gifts and prayers you have poured out on me. I have been so blessed by each and everyone of you.
Psalms 13:5-6 But I have trusted in Thy lovingkindness; My heart shall rejoice in Thy salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because He has dealt bountifully with me.
He truly has been wonderful to me!

2007-08-23T22:18:00.001-07:00

Hello Bloggers,
Life has been extremely busy and full of living. I have to put up one more wedding picture because it was such a beautiful day in South Lake Tahoe. I just got my CT results from last week back today, and all is well. The report states that there is no evidence of metastatic disease or local recurrence in the abdomen or pelvis, and the lungs and liver are as before with no change and clear, so everything is fine and I'm good for another 3 months!!! I even went back to work full time !!! God has been so good to me. He has been answering so many prayers. Thank you to all who have prayed for me, encouraged me and helped me through this past year. Yes, it's been one year. Tomorrow is my 1 year anniversary of diagnose, and Monday the 27th, is the day when God gave me the peace to handle my path and said He would be there for me and take care of my family and me. That is the day and moment that stands most clearly in my mind. I still feel His presence and His peace. I know I should not worry about tomorrow or all the other CTs that I will have because my life is in His hands. I have learned and gained so much this past year. More blessing than I could count! I also now take one baby aspirin a day which is supposed to help ward off recurrence of colorectal cancer. Plus there are studies that indicate that red meat raises the risk of colorectal cancer. So no more red meat for me, or at least very little. But, I can have margaritas!!! Yesterday, I took Kyle and Brigitte to Chico. It was a sad day saying goodbye to the kids, but fun in meeting Brigittes' roommate and setting up her door room. Kyle was easy to set up since he's been moving in all summer long in his apartment. Brigitte was harder since she was upset when it came time to say goodbye. I am now and empty nester except for Sean who I see once or twice a week. He's still looking for an apartment but it's really expensive and hard to find. I am looking forward to having a quiet and peaceful fall season. It's been way too busy these past few months. Next week I get to meet the doctor who will do my next colonoscopy in September. Yep! It's that time again. Even though I just had a CT, I still have to have the colonscopy every year. If any of you out there are holding off for your test, please make the call and get scoped. It's not that bad, and it is WAY worth it. Remember, colon cancer is 90% preventable. Just get the test, and a sigmoidoscopy doesn't count. You have to have the full scope.
God bless you all and I'll keep you posted as things happen....which seems to happen more often than not!
Psalm 29:4 The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace. He sure did bless my family and me with his peace, and he will bless you if you ask.

2007-08-10T02:44:00.000-07:00

Hi Bloggers,
I'm finally back from Bonnie's wedding and my father-in-laws funeral. The wedding went really well, and I have to thank my sisters and friends for pitching in to decorate the tables and set the beautiful flowers at the last minute. My sister Lorette and my niece Rachel, did all the flowers as well as the bouquets and table decorations, and they looked amazing. We couldn't get in to decorate the room until one hour before the wedding so it was a scramble. I was with Bonnie getting her ready at my uncles house in the Keys, so I couldn't help out. They did a great job and with the weather so nice it was beautiful! The early evening wedding was on the beach at Zepher Cove so we got to watch the sun set while dining and dancing. Bonnie made a beautiful bride and they both looked so happy. They are currently on their honeymoon in Costa Rica and will return This Saturday. We stayed up in Tahoe until Wednesday with my family then we went home to unpack, and repack for the trip to LA on Thursday morning. Friday was the funeral and Saturday was the internment. It was a warm and loving time and the whole family came together to celebrate Fred's life. Casey and the kids left on Sunday and I stayed with my mother-in-law until Thursday. Please keep her in your prayers because it will take some time for her to adjust to her new life. She was married to Fred for 62 years.
As for me, I'm doing better all the time. I was worried about how I would do at the wedding, but with all the help from everyone, I was fine and danced up a storm! I didn't walk for two weeks and I think that really helped me heal better. I believe I was over doing it with walking because I always felt swollen and had a lot of pressure. But after taking a two week break from walking, the swelling and pressure has gone way down. I'm back to walking again but not everyday. One day on and one day off so far. Monday I have my post op with my surgeon and he will determine if I'm ready for work starting on Tuesday the 14th. On the 16th I have a Ct at UCSF. It's been 3 months already since my last one. Time sure does go by fast. Please keep me in your prayers that all goes well. I know I'm in Gods hands and He is directing my path, and I also know he listens to our prayers. So please pray that I continue to be cancer free and that He gives me the strength and peace to handle what comes my way. My sister sent me this verse and it really helps me to know He watches over me and He loves me as His child.
"The Lord your God is with your, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing." Zep 3:17

2007-07-25T11:24:00.001-07:00

HI friends and family,
Just a quick note to let you know that Casey's father went home to the Lord yesterday morning. The service will be next Friday after Bonnie's wedding weekend. Casey spent Monday night with his dad in the hospital until Duffy came in around 5am on Tuesday so Casey could go to his mom's home to sleep. Fred passed peacefully with Kathy and Duffy, (Casey's sister and brother) by his side. It's been a very long and hard past two weeks for the family but they are all doing as well as can be expected. The family has been with Grandma the entire time. The pics are of Fred and Peggy dancing at Duffy's wedding last September and the of Fred with Bonnie and Brigitte playing around. He was a wonderful grandfather and we all loved him very much.
Lorette and I are headed up to Tahoe today to finish last minute plans for the wedding. Thank you for keeping us in your prayers. It seems we are in constant need of prayers lately. As for me, I am doing a little better each day. I think it will be a long process to get my body working up to speed, but I know I'll get there.
John 14:2-4 In my Father's house are many rooms, if it were not so I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you and if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to myself that where I am there you may be also. So God came and took Fred to his new Heavenly home.

2007-07-15T19:59:00.000-07:00

Good evening Bloggers! I have good news and not such good news, not about me. The sad news is Casey's father Fred, is in the hospital fighting pneumonia at age 97. He's been in since last week and is still fighting. Please keep the family in your prayers as it is a very hard thing to watch your father struggle.

The good news is God showed us a true miracle last week. My girlfriend (gf) was diagnosed with lung cancer last June with two metastasis to the bone. She has been fighting it and doing very well after each treatment. Every 6-9 weeks she has a CT scan to watch it. Well, in March she and I went to my church and asked the elders to pray on us as stated in James 5:13. Two days later she had another CT. The doctor said all was fine. Six weeks later another CT and again, the doctor said all is fine. Six more weeks and another Ct but this time my gf asked about the metastasis to the bone. The doctor seemed perplexed and asked what she was talking about. They looked back on the past CT and the metastasis did show on the past 3 CT's; the ones taken after the healing. So the doctor ordered a full bone scan. The results came back that there is no metastasis at all anywhere. What a true miracle He provided, and a blessing for all of us who know the Lord. He does listen to our prayers and He will take care of us in His time and way. We just have to continue to trust Him and keep the faith.

The picture is of my dog park friends. I joined the group 5 years ago with Kiwi. We are saying good bye to a park buddy.

Have a good week and stay happy, healthy and faithful to our Lord.

James 5:13 Is anyone of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise. Is anyone of you sick He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

2007-07-08T17:56:00.000-07:00

Hello blogger buddies! It has been just over two weeks since I had my "take down" surgery and the port removed, and I think I am doing just fine. The first week after the surgery was pretty rough. I wasn't far from the bathroom, and I needed vicodin to help me along. But the second week was much better. No need for vicodin and things are better each day. By last Monday, I was able to walk 3 miles, and I've been walking almost everyday since. Yesterday I spent the day in the delta at my sisters marina on Ryer Island in Rio vista, called SnugHarbor. We had a nice and quiet day moving furniture and having Kyle and his friend Joe hang pictures in a new home on the island. Kiwi, my yellow lab, loved playing in the water and swimming for sticks. By evening, my body seemed to be working over time so I left knowing I needed to be by my bathroom for the night. I know it will take months for me to be more normal so I just have to be patient. This last year has truly shown me the importance of patience. So now I am done with all my treatment, I just have to be checked every 3 months with a CT scan, and I have my yearly colonoscopy coming up in September. My next Ct will be in August at UCSF but the scope will be in San Ramon. I'm not looking forward to the scope but I better get used to it. I think I have to have one every year for the next 5 years or so. Again, I will need to be patient with each scan and scope and not worry about the results. I know God already knows my path; I just have to continue to follow Him. He has been there every step of the way for me and I have no reason to doubt He will continue to be with me. A cousin sent me this verse and it is so perfect for this time of my life. God bless you all and have a wonderful July. I'll write when I get back from Bonnie's wedding unless there is other news.
Psalms 27:14 Wait on the Lord, Be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord.

2007-06-24T17:48:00.000-07:00

I'm back! Last Wednesday I went in for the take down of my iliostomy and removal of the port. All went well. The surgery lasted about 2 1/2 hours but I wasn't in a room for another 4 hours because they didn't have a bed for me. They were busy that day. The first day after surgery was fine, but the next day was rough with my body trying to get started again. I came home on Saturday instead of Friday because my doctor was gone and his partner didn't come in to check me out on Friday. That was fine with me because I didn't want to go home after the night I had on Thursday. My sister Nicky took me home Saturday afternoon, because my family was all up in Tahoe for my nephews wedding. Last night we were all back together in the house and that was nice. My body began working, and working, and working again, and again and again.... so I was up all night. Today I took some pain meds and that helped considerably. I was told it will take a few months for my body to really be back to some what normal. I hope sooner because I have to be in shape for Bonnie's wedding in 5 weeks. I'm back on the BRAT diet (banana, rice, apple sauce and toast) and a few other foods. I have to have a low residue diet just like I did when I was in radiation. Then as I heal, I can add more foods a little at a time. In August I will go in for my quarterly CT at UCSF. I will let you all know when I go in and the results.
Thank you to everyone who has kept me in their prayers. I know the Lord heard because the surgery was a success and I am on the road to a full recovery and on the last leg of this journey. This past year has been such a growth and informative time for me. I continue to be amazed and blessed by so many loving, warm and generous people who reach out to me. I hope that I will be able to reciprocate back to all of you when and if you ever need a friend.
Psalms 40:11 Thou O Lord, wilt not withhold Thy compassion from me; Thy loving kindness and Thy truth will continually preserver me.
God bless you all and have a happy and safe July 4th.

2007-06-19T17:38:00.000-07:00

Hi to all my wonderful friends and family. These past few weeks have been great with no chemo, or doctor appointments. I just had fun with Bonnie's bridal shower two weeks ago, and getting ready for Brigitte's graduation. The picture is of Brigitte and Alyssia, her girl friend, whom I gave a diploma to. The tradition at our school is that a staff member can give a diploma if asked. It is really an honor and one I very much hold dear to my heart. She graduated on Friday the 17th and Sunday (Father's Day) we had a big party to celebrate her graduation and my soon to be "empty nest"! I'm looking forward to having my house stay clean when I get back from work, no shoes left by the front door for me to trip on, the sink will stay empty of dishes, and milk should last longer that a few hours. However, I will miss the commotion and chatter that is always abound when they are near. Brigitte will be attending Chico for teaching. Kyle will be there for Construction management and Bonnie and Ricky will be there in January for Construction Management as well. Who knows if Sean will soon follow. He's used to having them around to hang out with.
Tomorrow is the last surgery for me as far as I'm concerned! I will have the take down (remove the ilistomy) and have the port removed. The surgery will be at John Muir Concord campus starting at about 7:30 am and should take about 2 hours. I will have the morphine drip instead of the epideral block that I had last time for pain. I'd rather have the block because you don't get woozy or crazy from it like you do with morphine but it's not up to me. The plus side is it makes you sleep a lot! I should be out of the hospital on Friday if my body behaves and remembers how to work. I am not worried about it too much because I know God is looking after me and he hears all the prayers. Thank you to everyone for your prayers and support. The last nine months have been an interesting and growing time for me and my family. God has continued to bless us in so many ways, and I have felt so lucky to be blessed by all you bloggers buddies. My words can not express my deep gratitude and appreciation to each and everyone of you. I will try to have my sister update while I am in the hospital. God bless you all and please keep me and my family in your prayers tomorrow.
Psalm 9: 1-2 I will give thanks to the Lord with all my heart; I will tell of all Thy wonders, I will be glad and exult in Thee; I will sing praise to Thy name, O Most High.

2007-05-25T12:10:00.000-07:00

Happy Memorial Weekend! All is good in the Brierley household. My CT scan came out fine. I did have a small area where the colon inverted, but so small the UCSF doctor wasn't concerned. He also mentioned a very small (size of a dot from a pen) in my lung but said it could be anything. Most radiologist wouldn't even see it but UCSF goes through it with a fine tooth comb. He said it's very unlikely anything would grow while I was in treatment so not to worry. They'll just keep an eye on me. Ct every 3 months with more meds since I broke out again from the contrast. Also, I have the barium pelvic Xray and all is clear and no leakage or blockage. So I'm good to go for surgery to remove my bag and my port! June 20th 7:30am is the magic time!! Yes, I'm looking forward to it, however, after the barium Xray, I decided that having a bag wasn't so bad after all! My bone density test came out fine. I have nice strong bones so far. I will eat my calcium. Also, my Oncologist at UCSF said that there have been studies that suggest taking a baby aspirin (50 and older) not only helps with blood, but it helps to ward off breast and colon cancer. So I will be taking my baby aspirin as soon as I'm done with my surgery and healed. If any of you have friends or family that are going through cancer there is a good blog site http://www.cancercompass.com/ Click on message board to pick the cancer you want to discuss. It's been helpful and interesting to me.
This past week we have had my nephew Ryan and his friend Brian build our new deck so it's been pretty busy and dirty around here. We've had Sean, Kyle and Casey pitch in as well. A real family affair!
I hope everyone has a nice and restful Memorial Weekend and please remember to keep our young men and women who are serving in your prayers. They all need our support and prayers. God bless all of you and thank you so much for the prayers and concern that continue to uplift me and keep me strong. God does listen to prayers. He is there if you ever need Him.
Ephesians 1:18 I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened so that you may know what is the hope of His calling, what are the riches of the glory of His inheritance in the saints.

2007-05-21T11:38:00.000-07:00

Good morning to all my friends and family,
I am feeling really good these days. It will be three weeks this Thursday since the end of my last chemo treatment. The side effects are slowly going away and I'm looking forward to having a margarita to celebrate! Last week on Tuesday I went in for a CT at UCSF and once again I broke out from the contrast they put in me. I even took prednizone and benidrill to help with the reaction but it didn't help. I don't know what they'll do next. Then Thursday I got a call from UCSF that they saw something of concern. The nurse said it wasn't cancer but if I had any severe abdominal cramps to go to the emergence right away. That's all she said. I asked if someone put a time bomb in my stomach! On Friday, I saw my regular oncologist in Concord and he clarified what they saw. They think my colon may have inverted in itself. That is why it would give so much pain. My oncologist doesn't think that is the case. He thinks it just spasmed while I was having the Ct and it looked strange. I'll know for sure on Wednesday when I have a pelvic barium Xray. Tomorrow I'll have a bone density test for a base line. I hope all goes well. Please pray that it does and all is clear. They also had a few concerns of some spots in the lung, but they think it's non-calcified nodules so they want to watch and see. They don't seem to worried about those, mostly the colon and if it started to invert. They can fix it if it did. I am still scheduled for Surgery June 20th. I'm looking forward to it just so I can get back to my old self again. I am also looking forward to getting my energy back up to par since I have such a busy summer coming up. Tonight is Brigitte's Lacrosse banquet that I am in charge of. Tomorrow is Bonnie's 26th B-day and then June 2nd is Bonnie's bridal shower and Brigitte's Senior Ball. Graduation on the 15th and party on the 17th and finally surgery on the 20th. Through all this God has been so good to me. I was able to walk through all my chemo and I continue to feel better and better. Plus, He has put me in touch with so many wonderful and loving people. I do feel I am blessed in so many ways. Thank you again for your needed prayers and all you encouragement. Your love and encouragement give me strength. Thank you.
Romans 12:2 And do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. That you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. I know God has a plan for me and I am not going through all this just for the fun of it. His plan is always perfect even though we many not always understand it. He sees the big picture where we only see here and now. Trusting Gods plan is the best thing I can do for myself.

2007-05-09T04:21:00.000-07:00

Good morning! I had my last treatment of chemo last Thursday, yea!!! I am feeling good and am looking forward to having surgery in June. Next week I have my CT and then the following my pelvic x-ray and bone density test. I am really looking forward to getting all my strength, energy and life back this summer. God has been so great and I have had so many blessing through this entire experience. I truly hope and pray that if anyone finds themself in a dire situation, to please call on the Lord. I promise He won't let you down and He will be there every step with you.
The picture attached is of Brigitte and me last night at her last home game of her high school career. And for me it was the last home game with my own child after 13 consecutive years of high school sports. Time sure travels fast!
Isaiah 30:19 He will surely be gracious to you at the sound of your cry; when He hears it, He will answer you.
I like this verse because I know He has heard me many times and He always answers, in His time; I just have to listen. God bless you all and thank you for all your prayers through this journey. You have given me such encouragement, strength, and hope. Thank you

2007-04-24T06:28:00.000-07:00

Good morning bloggers! I hope everyone had a nice Easter and had the opportunity to visit with friends and family, and reflect on the gift that Christ gave us through his death. Eternal life with Him. I am very grateful and bless for that. I hope you are too. After Easter Sunday, we went to LA to visit family and enjoy the beach. We celebrated Brigitte's 18th B-day, went prom dress shopping, and just enjoyed looking at the beautiful ocean waves. Then last week I had my 7th chemo cycle. I have one more to go!!! Everything went OK. My blood counts are still holding up, so I feel very fortunate. I did manage to get a cold when I got back, but I seem to be fighting it so far. After my last cycle next week, I will have a Ct scan with non-ionic contrast with meds at UCSF on May 16th. Non-ionic because I am allergic to the regular contrast. The meds are benedrill, Zantack and cortisone to help with reaction. The scan is to check the liver and make sure it's OK and to get a baseline for future scans. Then the following week I will have a pelvic X-ray with contrast to make sure all is healed inside before surgery. Then June 20Th I am scheduled for the "take down" which means I will have my iliostomy and port removed....YEA! The surgery should take about 1-2 hours and the average stay is 2 days. Hopefully I'll be good to go by Bonnie's wedding in July. Thank goodness I have great sisters and friends to help with the last minute details.
Last week was very special. I had the elders of my church lay their hands on my and pray for healing. What a wonderful and loving experience. I truly felt the Lords peace and comfort surround me. I have been so blessed through my cancer experience. I can't imaging going through this without Him.
James 5:14 Is an one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord.

2007-04-09T03:52:00.000-07:00

Good morning! I hope everyone had a wonderful, loving and happy Easter. I know our family did. We celebrated by going to church in the morning and then having friends over for a nice Easter dinner in the evening. Today Casey and I, with Brigitte and her friend Morgan, are going to LA for the week to visit Casey's parents. We plan to spend a little time on the beach inbetween shopping for prom dresses for the girls and celebrating Brigitte's 18th B-day.
As for me, I am doing well with the treatments. I have two more cycles left. YEA! I usually don't feel so well a few days after treatment but do manage to continue to walk most days. It seems like some cycles are easier than others on my body. I have been very fortunate that my white cells, red cells and platlets are holding up so I don't have to be delayed in treatment, which is common. I try to drink Odwalla Blueberry juice most days and on some days carrot juice (yuck!) as well. I do feel that eating healthy, drinking lots of juices, taking a Flinstone multi vitamin every day and exercise has helped. My nutritionist said Flinstone vitamins are very good since it has everything in the right amount. The neuropathy in the hands continue to be uncomfortable but manageable. I just try to keep extra warm and wear gloves when reaching in the freezer. The picture is of my new hobby I started while I'm having treatment. I was inspired by the beautiful prayer shawl my sister-in-law, Leslie, made for me. I want to learn to knit or crochet so I bought a learning loom that makes it very easy to make scarves. It takes a long time to make a scarf so I can't imagine how many hours went into my shawl!
I have my appointment with UCSF for my first CT scan after treatment for a baseline. I'm in the process of scheduling my "take down" surgery, (close the iliostomy) for sometime in the early summer I hope. It will be hard to schedule inbetween the weddings, family reunions, bridal showers and graduations all this summer. How blessed we are to have so many happy occasions to get together with friends and family. God has been so good to me and to our family. He continues to give us peace and encouragement through all our trials. We are never alone. This Easter I hope and pray that everyone one of you get to know Him deeper, and accept His beautiful gift of eternal life with him through his son Jesus.
John 3:16-17 For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life. For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world; but that the world should be saved through Him.
Thank you for all your prayers and encouragement. I feel so blessed by all of you who continue to pray and encourage me. Thank you for sharing your love with me and my family.

2007-03-22T17:57:00.000-07:00

Hello Blogger Buddies. This is what Brigitte has been doing lately. She can't get enough of Lacrosse, she loves it. I just finished my 5th cycle and I'm so glad. I usually feel tired and a little nausea for a few days after treatment, but nothing compared to what others had to go through in the past. I still manage to walk at least 3 miles every day so I can't complain. The mole that was removed from my stomace came out clear and the polyp was fine as well. Thank God!! And thank you for your prayers. Speaking of prayers, last week at church I spoke with a friend about how I feel blanket by prayers. Then two days later I received from my sister-in-law a beautiful shawl that she crocheted for me. She said that as she was working on the the shawl, she was prayer for me. When I use the shawl, I feel the love and prayers that went into it. It seems like God is showing me in a very physical way that I am covered in prayers. He is with me every step of the journey. He is amazing and I hope that if any of you ever find that you are facing a cul-de-sack in life, please let Him guide you. He won't let you down and you won't go through the valleys alone.
Did you get scoped yet (a sigmoidoscopy doesn't count)!??? Did you know that when you go for you colonoscopy, you don't have to drink a gallon of the fluid any more?? They now have pills instead, or you can opt for the 4oz bottle and drink lots of water. It really isn't as bad as you think, so please make your appointment! Also, remember to get a copy of the pathology report and if you do have a polyp, please ask as to what kind. Some turn to cancer and some do not. Important to know what you have and keep records. God bless you all and thank you for all your encouraging words, prayers, thoughts and love that continue to come my way.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our afflication so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any afflication with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

2007-03-08T16:47:00.000-08:00

March is Colorectal awareness month. If you haven't had the pleasure of having a colonoscopy yet, (not just sigmoid) and you are 50 or more, or have had some type of symptoms like IBS or other issues, please go for the easy test. It is not as bad as you think.
I just finished my 4th cycle of chemo and am doing OK. Today I felt a little tired and had a little nausea but pills are wonderful! I still plan on walking my 3 miles tonight. Yesterday I had a sonogram to check my ovaries and uterus. The doctor wants to see what damage if any was caused by radiation and the fact that I went from not even close to menopause to post menopause in 5 months. No wonder I have trouble sleeping! Too many "personal summer days and nights!" There was also a polyp in the cervix which will have to be removed. I went to my dermatologist last week since I hadn't been in 3 years. She didn't like a mole on my stomach, which I though was a freckle, so two more stitches in my belly. I will have the results in about a week. Thank God for all the prayers that continue to lift me up. I know I'll be fine because I am not going through all this alone. I have God hearing all your prayers and He does listen. He continues to give my family and me peace each day. I hope and pray that if or when you find yourself in need of Gods grace, you too will feel His presence and know He is with you. Thank you for you continual uplifting notes, cards, e-mails, prayers and love. God bless you all
Psalms 34:4 I sought the Lord, and He answered me, And delivered me from all my fears.

2007-02-24T14:44:00.000-08:00

Hi blogger buddies! All is well in Pleasanton. Brigitte is at her soccer game, Kyle is working at Snug Harbor (my sisters marina), Sean is at work, Bonnie and Ricky are on their way up to visit and Casey is in LA with his parents. so it's a nice quiet day to do some blogging. The pic was taken in Tahoe last weekend when we were looking for Bonnie and Ricky's wedding venue. I had my third cycle of Folfox 6 last Wednesday. All went well. I now feel the neuropathy in my hands most of the time, but it should only last about a week and then subside until the next treatment in two weeks. My energy is still pretty good. I try to walk most days at least 3 miles. I do skip it when it's raining though. Yesterday I took a 3 hour nap in the middle of the day! That is unheard of for me. I have never taken a 3 hour nap in my life so I guess I must be getting tired once in a while. Today I feel back up to speed. As for my weight, I actually gained 3 lbs last week. I was challanged because the nurse told me I wouldn't gain wait with the chemo and the bag. I do like my food and challanges!!! I'm sure I'll lose it this week so I'm not worried. Next week I have an appointment with a dermatologist, OBGYN, and my Oncologist. I do feel like I have been living at the doctor's office lately. Thank you to all who continue to keep me in their prayers. Everyday I feel the Lords blessing in my family and in my life. He does listen to prayers and He continues to bring comfort, peace and hope each and every day.
Hebrews 4:16 Let us therefore draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and may find grace to help in time of need.

2007-02-09T12:06:00.000-08:00

Good morning bloggers. I am doing really well today. I had my first folfox 6 treatment on Tuesday and all went well except my red and white blood counts are pretty low. I now get a weekly shot of Procrit which helps stimulate the body to produce more red blood cells. It has to be watched carefully due to high risk of blood clots. Yikes! Also my white cell count is 1.8 which is low; 4-10 is average. If it gets below 1 then I'll probably have to have another type of shot or hold off on the next round of chemo. So everyone who comes in the house has to wash their hands. I do feel fine though. Still walking daily, unless it's raining, and my appitite is good. I'm not losing any more weight. I can eat anything I want and I still don't gain weight. It's amazing!! What a way to diet!!!
The picture is of Brigitte and her friend Scott, (who is the pilot) about ready to go in the glider. What fun!! She flew over the delta out of Livermore.
Well, thank you again to all who continue to encourage, strengthen, and pray for me and my family. It is truly amazing how prayers work. God listens and he continues to give my family so much peace. We are so blessed!!!
Psalm 37:4-7 Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you your hearts desire. Commit your way to the Lord, Trust also in Him, and He will do it. And He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your judgement as the noonday

2007-01-30T04:41:00.000-08:00

It's another beautiful moring in blogger land! The picture of my very happy dog Kiwi shows how I am feeling as I blog, because I went to UCSF for my second opinion yesterday. I had many questions answered about my chemo regimine and am very happy about the new change. It is recommended that I switch from using Folfox 4 for 6 months to Folfox 6 for 4 months. That means that I only have 7 more cycles of treatment to go, and I'll be done with it by May if all goes well! The difference from Folfox 4 to folfox 6 is that I only have to go to treatment every other week for two days instead of three, I get less 5-FU each cycle but a little more Oxaliplatin, and since it's for 8 cycles instead of the 12, it gives less toxicity to the body overall. The data shows no difference in outcome, so less is better. Also, it is recommended I do not take Avastin because of all the unknown and unanswered questions that Avastin carries for stage III cancer. Finally, the doctor also recommended that once I am through with treatement, I get a CT scan every 3 months for the next 3 years due to the 25% risk factor of it re-occuring. I will have my scans done at UCSF. It's amazing to me how each time I have been to UCSF, my course of treatment has changed. I can't stress to you how important it is to get a second opinion and even a third if need be. When you are talking about a life, it is well worth the time and effort. It's pretty scary not knowing what to do when each decision is so important and life threating, but knowing that God is with me, guiding me and showing me each step or path to take is what keeps me at peace. I know God is in control and He will continue to watch over my family and me each and every day.

John 16:33 These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage, I have overcome the world.

2007-01-24T04:33:00.000-08:00

Good morning blogger buddies. Well, I'm into my first of 12 chemo series treatments. Yesterday I was there from 9:30-3:45 and today it should be only about 3 hours. Tomorrow will be about 1/2 hr to remove the buddy pack until the next series in two weeks. Yesterday took a little longer than expected because my port in my chest would not work right. It took just under 2 hours to get it working. It would allow drugs into the body but not allow for removal of blood. It's a two-way port and only one way was working. Apparently, sometimes the body produces a film inside that blocks the exit of fluid from the port. The nurse gave me a med that disolved it enough to allow full usage of the port...for the day. It will probaby happen again, but at least I was able to start the series. I didn't have too much trouble after that. Of the three types of chemo I received, I had a slight reaction to the Oxaliplatin. It sped up my heart rate from 60 to about 80 within the first hour. So next time I get it I will be given more bennidrill (I had 12.5mg instead of the usual 25mg) Today I will have Leuccvorin and 5FU bolus or booster like yesterday but without the Oxaliplatin. I am carring around my buddy pack again for 3 days each series. I Think over all I did pretty well, except my dear husband Casey gave me a bad head cold that came out the day before treatment. I had to take Sudafed during treatment to breath. They weren't concerned about me being sick at the start because it's not an infection...yet. I hope it doesn't go to my chest. As for nausea, I haven't experienced that yet and hopefully I won't. They gave me an anti-nausea drip, steriod drip, (are you jealous Barry?) and a few othet drips to help boost up the body. I did not start the Avastin drug yet because I was not 4 weeks out from surgery, whick is a must. I will start that on the next series in two weeks. In the meantime, I will see a doctor at UCSF for a second opinon on the drug regimine. I thought it was interesting that of the 6 patients in the room, 4 to 5 of us were dealing with colorectal cancer. You can tell by the buddy packs around the room, and the nurse mentioned a few. I hope you all are getting your colonoscopy !! Thank you all for your continual prayers and encouragement. Sometimes I get comments about being so positive and srtong, and that comes from not only knowing that God is with me every step of the way, but also from all of you who are praying for me, and encouraging me in so many ways. As I said before, I am truly blessed by each one of you in my life. Thank you
Mark 11:23,24
Truly I say to you, whoever says to the mountain, Be taken up and cast into the sea, and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says is going to happen, it shall be granted him. Therefore, I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they shall be granted to you.

2007-01-17T15:01:00.000-08:00

HI everyone and happy January. I am doing really well these days. I have been out walking almost every day up to 5 miles (in two outings). I have my energy back and am now ready for chemo. Monday I talked with my Oncologist and he wants me to take Folfox 4 with Avastin for the next 6 months every two weeks. It will be administered over 3 days, the first day for 5 hours, the next day for 3, and the third day just for about an hour or so to remove the bed buddy pack. Yes, I will have my bed buddy back for two nights every two weeks. I can't say I've missed her but we'll get reaquainted. The folfox treatment is a mixture of 3 different drugs. 5-FU (what I previously had in the pack), leucovorin (folinic acid)and oxaliplatin. This is standard treatment for stage III cancer. Avastin is a drug that is currently used and approved for stage IV cancer but not stage III. Which means, my insurance will not cover it and we will have to pay for it. It is quite expensice but my doctor feels it may have good results. It's used by cutting of the blood supply to the tumor. Since I no longer have a tumor, we are not sure if it will help or not, but I have talk to a few different doctors and they agree with the use. It's been a hard decision but we are going to go for it. The doctors hope is it will give better odds that the cancer will not return at a future date. So Monday I go in for a "teach" class about the drugs. Tuesday I will start my first treatment. Please keep me in your prayers that all goes well.
Hebrews 10:23,24
Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful: and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds.

2007-01-07T15:50:00.000-08:00

Happy New year!! I am feeling really good after a week of recuperation. I'm up to walking again and feeling my energy increase each day thanks to all the wonderful people who have been bringing in great dinners!!! My appetite is back in full force!! The picture is of my very special "healing Hands" blanket from my Foothill Family. It keeps me warm and loved every minute!
The first few days home were a little rough for me having to get used to a new addition to my body...an ileostomy. It's an "off ramp", as Casey calls it, between my small and large intestines. I will have it through chemo and until my colon heals completely. I was supposed to have a home health nurse come three days a week starting right away to help me out, but as I was leaving the hospital, the nurse informed me that they couldn't find anyone to come to my home. To say the least, I was upset, scared, and had a million questions on how to care for this new thing. But once again, God provided. My neighbor came over and offered her help. She is a retired nurse who used to work with patients and ostomys. She even drove me up to John Muir the next day for a visit with the ostomy nurse. I am feeling much more at ease now and am learning to adjust. As for the next round of treatment, I should be starting chemo in about 3 more weeks. I do have a second opinion appointment at UCSF for chemo on the 29th of January. Since there were so many lymph nodes involved, they want to go heavy on the drugs and wipe any hidden cells. I say go for it!. I have always said that God gives you only what you can handle. Now I realize that when there is more than you can handle, He comes along and helps carry part of the load. He also helps you find your way. A dear friend told me that when He brings you to your knees it's only because He wants you to see His path more clearly. I know that as I go through this next phase of treatment, God will be right there with me. I won't be carrying it alone. I pray if one of you go through trials or tribulations, you remember that God is with you and He will help you each and every step if you let Him.
Jeremiah 29:11-12
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you.

2006-12-31T19:25:00.000-08:00

I'm back!!!!! It's New years Eve and am sitting down stairs after a wonderful dinner. Thank you to all who have been bringing us dinners. It is such a help to all of us and we love the food. Thank you. I am doing ok. I'm taking Darvocet and that seems to help. The pathology results came back. They took out 15 lymph nodes and 11 were positive. I was pretty disappointed and a little shocked. We thought only one may have been involved, but 11?? I was disappointed for a while but then I try to remember to trust God. He knew already the results and He knows how I'll be in the future. I just have to trust Him. The surgery was very sucessful according to the doctor. Very clean margins, and he got everything. He wants me to start chemo in 4 weeks instead of the usual 6 weeks so he can blast any remaining cells that may be present. I'll be making a lot of calls on Tuesday to set up appointments and try to get a second opinion for chemo at UCSF before I start.
Thank you so much for all your continued prayers and support. My family and I appreciate each and everyone one. No words can express the gratitude and love I have for all of you. Here is a poem my friend passed on to me that I want to share. Happy New Year to all and God bless you in 2007

New year's Prayer by Helen Steiner Rice
You are ushering in another year,
untouched and freshly new,
So here I am to ask you, God, if
you'll renew me, too.
but, Father, I am well aware
I can't make it on my own,
So take my hand and hold it tight,
for I can't walk alone.

2006-12-31T10:27:00.000-08:00

Jill is home now and resting. She needs to slowly recuperate. She is feeling pain now that the epidural has worn off. Keep her in your prayers and thank you for the continued support. When Jill gets a chance she will give a more detailed update.

2006-12-29T17:15:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone in Bloggerland. Jill is doing great. I am sorry it took so long for me to get to an internet connection and let you all get an update. She feels great for someone having had a major operation as she has had. This morning she was up by 5 am, and at 6:00 the nurses took out most of her IV lines. Then she took a walk of 6 rounds on her floor -- all before 7 am. You just can't keep this girl down!! But as her big sister, and I guess I have always known this. Back in Burbank growing up, she was the one jumping on the beds in the morning. Wake up... Wake up!
Anyway, the doctor said she is looking so good, but he wants her to REST! Doctor says she is healing very quickly. It looks like if all is well tomorrow, she could be home at some point on Saturday. Thanks for checking in and sending up so many prayers for her. She sends her love and happy cheer to everyone! Jill will be back to updating this blogger site hopefully by Sunday.
Have Blessed New Year!
Updates have been by Big Sis- Lorette

2006-12-28T13:29:00.000-08:00

Good Morning Everyone! Jill is feeling so much better. Its really amazing. That epidural drip is great. She really doesn't feel any pain. As a result she is alert and talking, and just her regular self. She had breakfast with Casey -- liquid style-- and today it stayed down. That's a good sign. She was waiting for lunch at 12:30 when I left and actually feeling hungry. She will take a nap this afternoon. Jill said to let people know that its okay to call her cell phone or the hospital. I would suggest between 8 am and 8 pm. Know that she will probably be taking naps after lunch though. Thank you for the ecards that have come in already. She recieved twelve this morning!! from everywhere!!
Here is a picture from yesterday to share. I want to tell you the story behind the picture. Jill calls it a "God thing", a real blessing in so many ways. Yesterday morning Casey and Jill left for the hospital at 5:00 am or so. The night before she had said good night to the kids, all but Sean. He wasnt' there--working or something like that. She missed him but thought" oh well???" Anyway, all the kids showed up at the hospital to wait with Casey during the operation. (Except Sean who was working) Nicki, Linda were here also, and I showed up later after my drive up from SB. The family was waiting in the Lobby in the afternoon by then. Then in walks Sean in his AMT uniform. He sees Bonnie first and then the rest of the family. The "what-are-you-doing-here" begin. It turns out Sean, who works for Alameda county AMT had to deliver an emergency patient to Contra Costa County -- right to John Muir Concord. Then his ambulance breaks down as they are pulling in. He has to wait for a towtruck. Sooooo while waiting, he goes inside to get something to eat. And there is his family!! He was shocked because he thought his Mom was over in John Muir Walnut Creek. Anyway, Jill was coming out of recovery and being sent up to her room 6213-1. The picture is the family together Greeting Jill, Sean included.

2006-12-27T21:21:00.000-08:00

OOPS!! For those of you paying attention! I got the wrong room number below. Jill is in room 6213-1 at the John Muir Medical in Concord. You can send her a ecard at this link -- https://www.johnmuirhealth.com/index.php/greeting.html?src=homepage
It would be better not to call, as she is resting a lot right now. But Cards are great!!!

2006-12-27T16:37:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone out there who has been waiting for an update on Jill. Jill is out of surgery. She went in around 7:30 and came out sometime around 1:30. She was then in recovery for 2 hours. Casey and the kids, Nicki and myself ( Lorette) were able to finally see her around 3:30. Jill looks great and is feeling pretty good. She has an epidural (sp?) drip that is very comfortable for her at least right now. The doctor wants her to rest and take it easy. Casey will be staying with her tonight. The doctors update as I understand it-- a lymph node and other tissue was also removed in the area of the tumor. He thought it looked good but until the results of the biopsy, we don't know for sure the actual stage. Jill is in good spirits, as always, and Casey keeps her laughing. Keep them in your prayers. Jill sends her love to everyone. She is soooooo lifted up by everyone's concern and love and FUNNY cards!!!. She is at the John Muir Hospital ??? in Concord and you can send ecards through their hospital site. I will keep you posted as best as I can. You can call the Brierley household and leave your number. One of us will try to get back to you. Her room is 6013 if you want to send her an ecard. She gave you the address in the blog below. Please don't call the room because she will be resting A LOT!!

2006-12-23T16:56:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas! Are you ready?? One more day to shop! These last few weeks have been great. My strength and appetite have all come back and I feel almost as good as new. I'm very grateful that I have this time to get ready for Christmas. This week I went for my pre-op with the doctor and the hospital, and had all the blood work, chest x-rays and EKG done. I am almost ready for surgery on Wednesday. I still have to drink the wonderful gallon of mixture on the 26th. The surgery should last about 4 hours and I should be in the hospital for about 4-5 days. If interested, John Muir Hospital, Concord campus, has a website where people can send e-cards and volunteers will print out and bring to the patient. https://www.johnmuirhealth.com/index.php/greeting.html?src=homepage
I will have one of my sisters update my blogger site for me so all my friends and family will know how the surgery went. Please keep me and my family in your prayers on the 26th at 7:30am.
Words can not express how grateful and appreciative my family and I are for all the love, support, prayers and concerns that have been raining down on us since I was first diagnosed. To everyone, Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Please have a very Merry Christmas and remember to invite Jesus to your celebration! God bless you all and have a safe and loving 2007

And the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of a great joy which shall be for all the people; For today in the city of David there has been born for you a Savior, who is Christ the Lord".
Luke 2:10-11

2006-12-08T14:31:00.000-08:00

Happy Christmas Season! I hope this new post finds you enjoying the Christmas season and trying not to stress too much. As for me, I am enjoying the time for walks, listening to music, slowly putting up decorations, and just feeling good. Yesterday I had the endo-rectal ultrasound. All went pretty well. The radiation treatments did shrink the tumor enough so the doctor will be able to get clean margins at surgery, so that is good news. I am feeling really well and will be able to enjoy my Christmas dinner before I have to fast for the surgery on the 27th. Here is a poem that was sent to me in a book that I thought was true.
What Cancer Cannot do
Cancer is so limited-
It cannot cripple love,
It cannot shatter hope,
It cannnot corrode faith,
It cannot destroy peace,
It cannot kill friendship,
It cannot suppress memories,
It cannot silence courage,
It cannot invade the soul,
It cannot steal eternal life,
It cannot conquer the Spirit.
I have found that not only is the above listed true, but
It can make you closer to God,
It can make you stop and appreciate each day,
It can bring families closer together,
It can make love grow,
It can friendships into your lives,
And it can save other lives by reaching out to others.
God bless you all and have a wonderful, happy, healthy, and loving Christmas season
Psalm 9:10
And those who know Thy name will put their trust in thee: For Thou, O Lord, hast not forsaken those who seek Thee.

2006-12-03T15:18:00.000-08:00

HI Everyone,

Today is a beautiful day to go for a hike, and that's just what I did today! I am feeling really well, and full of energy now that my intestines have settled down since the end of all the treatments. I have even started to gain back some weight...yikes! Next week we are going to set up our Christmas tree and start getting ready for Christmas and the celebration of the birth of our Lord. It usually takes a few days to set up, but on Thursday I will have to take a break because I am scheduled for an endorectal ultrasound to look at the size of the tumor, or what is left of it. As far as I am concerned, it's as good as gone! I am feeling very positive and uplifted because of all of the love and prayers that has been coming my way everyday. There is so much power in prayer. I do hope and pray that each one of you finds the love, peace, and hope that God gives to those who ask. He is an amazing God!
Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.

2006-11-25T16:47:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving! I hope everyone had as nice of a Thanksgiving as our family had this year. Our Thanksgiving started with a big, family and friends, football game in Livermore. Then we had dinner with our very special friends the Allens, who hosted my family of 18. With her family and friends for a total of about 26 for a great sit-down dinner. Then on Friday, we headed up to Napa to have Thanksgiving with more of our family, including my father who came out of the hospital for the occasion. We had about 30 for another great feast. We each had an opportunity to tell my father how thankful we are to him for all he has done for us. A true thanksgiving and a great memory for us all. We have so much to be thankful for each and everyday, it's a shame we can't celebrate thanksgiving every week! Of course we would all have to diet during the week to survive those big feast! After 2 full days, I am taking it easy watching TV, reading, and doing e-mail. It's been two weeks since my last treatment and I am doing better each day. I'm taking lots of vitamins and other supplements so I will be ready for surgery on the 27th of December. I am very thankful to everyone for your continual love, support, and prayers. I am doing better each day because of you. Thank you
Colossians 2:6-7
So then, just as you received Christ Jesus a Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness

2006-11-15T14:25:00.000-08:00

Life has been pretty quite lately. Back when I was working and extremely busy with life, sometimes, I would think about how nice it would be to be stuck in bed for what ever reason. To have the time to read, nap, or just listen to music. Well, now I find myself in that exact position and I don't like it. It didn't occur to me how sick or sore one must to be, to be stuck in bed or in a house day after day. I am ready to get on with life, but my intestines are not. And since they are the rulers of my body at this time, I must listen to them and stay put. I was told it takes about 2 weeks before my bowels start to heal after treatment, but I only have one week to give, because next week is Thanksgiving and my family will be up to celebrate. We are planning on a two day Thanksgiving celebration. Thursday with our dear friends the Allen's, and Friday in Napa with my sisters. Any weight I have lost by now I'm sure to gain back by the end of next week! December starts the prep for surgery. I will have the endorectal ultrasound December 7th to see how much the radiation/chemo treatments killed the tumor. December 27th is my surgery to remove all remaining tumor. I should be in the hospital about 4-5 days. This is a good week for my family because it's Casey's slow time at work, Bonnie will be up for the holiday and the kids are all out of school; so they'll be able to come visit me! I will start the new year a tumor free woman! To all my friends and family, have a very happy and healthy Thanksgiving and remember to thank God for all of His love and blessings.
Psalm 46:1
God is our refuge and stength. A very present help in trouble.
And I can say He has been with me each and everyday and through all my treatments. He never leaves me. Thank you for your continued prayers. God bless.

2006-11-11T08:55:00.000-08:00

I'm a free woman!!! Yesterday was my last treatment with radiation and I gave back my bed buddy as well. I got to take a nice long shower without wrapping up in Saran wrap! Some of the simple things in life are so nice, and yet we forget how much they mean to us....Until you go 6 weeks without. Then it's a whole new world again! I had a great day yesterday. My friends were over to visit and I was feeling great. Now that I am done with treatment, I will be getting a call as to when the surgery is scheduled. I'm still looking at the last week in December or first week in January, but it will depend on the outcome of the endorectal ultrasound that I will have in about 4 weeks. The doctors feel I went through treatment really well, and I attribute it to all the love and support I am getting from everyone. My family has been great! They make me feel like "we" are going through treatment, not just me. I am so blessed! I've asked my kids how they are feeling and they tell me they feel fine, and positive. I know they are feeling all the love and prayers as well so again, thank you so much for keeping my family and I lifted up all these weeks.
Psalms 16:11 Thou wilt make known to me the path of life; In Thy presence is fullness of joy; In Thy right hand there are pleasures forever.